What we spend our lives?
Who knows how many from the fortune
Again he measured a road?
We are all still alive, strive eventful, colourful and eventful life.
But, without knowing it, very often spoil it. I will not dwell on the wrong diet, excessive alcohol consumption or Smoking, not to mention drugs. These are all topics for another, very informative conversation. Let us try to understand one another.
Man, blinded by love, hiding his mate from everyone and everything, trying to lock her in four walls. Is it not an obstacle to our happiness?
You say it's not love! And you will be right! The selfishness of the owner, in its purest form!
But he, without knowing it, digging a deeper hole for themselves. The more carefully he hides his wife, trying to replace the entire world, the sooner will evaporate love that pushed her into his arms. And, in the end, she turns away. The gap is inevitable!
We women, this Vice can also be found. And I would not say that less than them. All know the feeling - I want him to always be near. Over time, one earlier, one later it turns into total control: "Where was that? ""Why were you late? ""Oh! With friends drinking beer!? And the wife is already on your side? " And family begin disassembly. Between the lines, I say that if a woman, in most cases, this homemade cat whom want their own house, warmth and comfort, the man, again, in most cases, this is a cat walking by himself.
Man is the hunter, whose contempt for the coziness laid at the gene level. Of course, I'm exaggerating a little. In order to clearly show differences in views on family life. And life in General. But, the essence will not change. If the woman is dearer to a soap Opera, in the form of infinite series, where and actions, and as such is not observed, all at the level of feelings and emotions, the male will give the football, and it is better American or Boxing, where on the contrary, feelings, and does not smell, brute force and the power of the flesh.
What can you do, we are different!
The husband may starve. Years to go in the same suit and worn-out shoes, and the last penny to invest in your pet on four wheels.
Wife is ready to sit on some salad leaves (not only for figures) but will not hesitate to lay out a fabulous sum, that jumps to her handbag. And he and she are convinced, moreover, irrevocably, that half of them empty, spends money.
Nothing will say, we are different!
But, let's stop. Such examples do not count. Nomen illis legio. And these are enough to show how there are family problems. Here's the strange thing (or maybe legitimate? usually it turns out that the entire burden of solving these problems lies on one of the spouses. And another paradox - each of them seriously convinced that it is on his shoulders. Each believes that he bears the greatest moral, psychological and financial losses.
Stop!!!
Here it would be nice to stop. For both of them. And to solve the main question: "what are they married? Why are they really together? "
Ideally, this should be resolved before marriage, until the moment when two people decide to live together. But.... most often this does not happen. In most cases, feelings overshadow the mind. Cost only words: "I love you! I like you! I with you good! " and immediately: "let's get married! "
And for what?
In practice turns out that after two, three years, having experienced and survived all the charm of intimacy and tired of it, start looking for new sensations. As anything except this proximity of people not bind!
I don't say it at all. No! In no case! But very often. In favor of such approval, the statistics of divorce. Number of family quarrels and squabbles, which, alas, nor under what statistics will not fail. And if it would be the reader's hair stand on end.
And all of them due to not understanding, not from the ability to understand the psychology of a spouse, and often from not desire this. However, creating a family making a decision about living together, without addressing this issue is simply not enough.
Have you heard about the psychological incompatibility?
But these issues are serious scientific organization. And when creating a team, managers should be interested in. Otherwise, all efforts will be wasted.
So why when creating a family, we usually rely only on feelings?
Young? Green? Yes! Yes! Yes! A thousand times. Yes! But, I would add - illiterate.
Very few of us in the youth talked about the psychological difference in the behavior of men and women, in their attitude to life. If they say something casual, so, inadvertently.
And the intimate sphere? She did, for centuries, have been banned. And only in recent years has become known to many. And then, I would say, not with the best hand.
But it is in a vulnerable woman. And if in real life she is, barely, still can put up with rudeness (sometimes, it is even tempted), reactionsto and, even with rudeness men, the emotional and intimate relationship it just kills.
Let us leave these questions... Yet. Until the next article. And consider how that can make a marriage strong and reliable. For the whole life. The climate in the family, understanding all this is well and fine. It is absolutely necessary. But most importantly, I believe, this understanding that combining their destinies people become one. They should have one, great, the only goal in life and accordingly the program.
Sometimes, I admit, and very often, people find this purpose and this program intuitively, at the level of feelings.
But unfortunately not many.
The author of the image
Sweetlana Kiss
Author:
Abigail
Source:
here
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