In the paddling community has its own regulations. If they are violated, the offender make it clear that they think about it. Child openly warn that if there is to Snitch, be greedy, to roar, then it will not communicate. Psychologists believe that teasers is an indicator of a healthy relationship in the children's team. So the children demonstrate that they can fend for themselves without the help of adults and fists. In fact teasers are designed to put the offender on the spot to show their attitude to unpleasant behavior, habits, and appearance.
The child takes the skills of families in children's collective. However, the same steps at home and on the street are perceived differently. Home adults require that the child told about all their actions, and among peers such behavior is discouraged, and the child immediately falls into the category of Abed. Remember the poem about the tattletale? "Sneak-karabuda pickles, lying on the floor, no one eats! "
If the house get all the best kids in the yard who alone eats candy, does not allow to ride your bike, does not allow you to play with their toys, falls into the category of greedy. And the children immediately correct unwanted behavior: "Stiff-beef, empty chocolatina. Sausages wrapped in, that was not angry! " At home the child is able to achieve much weeping, but in the children's team Plaks do not favor: "Reva-cow give milk! How much? Three penny! " From the point of view of children, crybaby interfere with play. Actually the baby is crying due to the fact that not coping, emotions. His behavior, he attracts the attention of adults. And therefore, can easily tell tales about, to call for help in a strong defender, and it can damage and even lead to termination of the game. They react to crying: soothe a crying, trying to find out why crying - all of this interferes with play. Crybaby - same-breaker game, as Abedi, cormorant and voobrazhala. All of them (each in their own way! a ) violate the unwritten rules of children's collective. Sneak - 't want to make a responsible decision (to deal with the offender himself), and seeking help from an adult. The greedy man is not divisible, and thus distinguishes itself among equals. Voobrazhala - requires exceptional attention. Thus, teasers become an important tool of social regulation of child behavior.
There are teasers and obsevance, making fun of kids with glasses, thick or too thin, teasers on the first or last name. "Lesha-cake, the head with the basket, hat-pegs, legs a log". Their object could be any child, even one who has done nothing wrong! Teasers-obsevance especially popular among younger students. In this form manifests the children's desire to explore "border patience classmate before he can shout "I am now as you ladies! ".
If you tease your child, talk to him and advise the following:
To perceive the "irritation" as a test. This will help to cope with the feelings that overwhelmed and causes aggression.
Behave outwardly as calmly as possible. Do not allow yourself to be offended or angry and even more do not show these feelings. Pretend that you are at all uneasy, and you don't pay attention. You can use the usual excuse - too lazy to respond to the name calling: "what are you all about himself, about himself and about me a word?! "
If you tease or call and there is no escape, it must immediately respond with excuses. Words to answer with words. For children it is very important to be able to answer teaser to shout excuse - a kind of protection against verbal attacks. Knowledge of such excuses helps not to leave an insult unanswered, to prevent conflict, to maintain outward calm, surprise, therefore, to stop the attacker. There's the traditional excuses that are passed from generation to generation, as well as the texts of bullying and obsivac. The most simple: "Who obzyvaetsya - he's called! " Or: "to Talk to me to translate for yourself! "
To respond in a creative way. The abuser always expects to receive from a "victim" of a certain reaction is resentment, anger. Non-standard response is able to stop the aggression. For example, you can laugh together: "Yes, it's our last name, my father and grandfather teased as well".
Source:
psylist.net
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