The different roles that men can play in interaction with a woman, linked with the stages of his own life, forming four sexual role of men: son, brother, knight, father.
If psychosexual development were more or less normal, Mature personality combines all four of the incarnation, and the man offers the woman in all its uniqueness. If the life conflicts boy stuck to his psycho-sexual way, at one stage of development, the consequences are manifested in adult life, the man starts to signal to women their neurotic attitudes, completely knocking them back, asking them inconceivable mysteries about his inappropriate behavior.
Example
son-lover is the so-called playboy, so frivolous, immature boy, it's fun lavishes money and sexual energy. Sexual life illegible, he easily leaves his sexual partner, he must remove physical tension than to get physical satisfaction. As a rule, these men have problems with alcohol, they are not able to rationally manage money. Gambling and other little quirks brighten their carefree existence. This infantile personality, which has suffered in childhood in the emotional coldness of the mother, the world seemed to owe him, he's looking for a woman who will support him and will be his loving mother, forgiving all his cute antics. Often it is the woman that are older, from which it depends. Woman for her son-lover is always a maternal figure.
The role of brother. This role defines asexual approach to the woman. He refers to the woman as the older brother, not realizing that such sentiments generate response asexual reaction, while he is a good husband, he makes money, he is responsible for all in house. And waiting for a miracle in sex from the wife of the elder brother easily drops down to the position of younger brothers, which shifts the responsibility for failure on the woman, losing their masculinity. How to turn wife if she has to deal with my brother? As a child, a boy regretted his mother, together with her against the tyranny of the father, i.e., the boy took on the role of a brother, which he carried into adulthood. This passive-feminine man, he retains a boyish traits, there is no aggressiveness. If a man wants to be aggressive towards a woman, he needs to know his power, to feel it and to own it, but the man is the brother that's not enough, he is weak and helpless.
The role of the knight. In psychoanalysis is phallic man. This man is obsessed with sexual prowess, his strength is identified with the phallus, he is aggressive and assertive. But his neurosis - a deep fear of woman, which at one time had laid his mother. The so-called great lover, Casanova, etc.were these knights without fear and reproach. Their main achievement is victory over women, all his interest is seducing women encounter with them, but he does not feel orgasmic perfection. Phallic man is afraid to surrender completely to the woman. Casanova died in loneliness and poverty. The knight cannot combine sex and love. Love prosecution explains his unconscious anxiety, each new victory for him is proof of his virility, potency. Phallic male, thus unconsciously competing with authoritarian father, from the point of view of the emotional sphere hero-knight - this is the eternal teenager. This man quickly loses interest in his wife after marriage, it is because the marriage bond look like a victory for women, as a restriction of his freedom, which stimulates his desire to stand on the war path and continue its triumphant way in search of his ideal. These men know how to make money t.to. they are a symbol of its independence, and in the eyes of women, it is a symbol of social success. Life can make such a man to grow up and move on to the position of father.
The role of the father. Father - personality hard, if not sadida. As the father is neurotic in nature and involves asexual approach to the woman, where the woman takes on the role of mother stradley with masochistic traits. When he takes possession of his wife, it ceases to be a sexual object, he unconsciously becomes a father. He strictly goes with his wife, believing that she should bear children and do house. It may even be hard on children. Loss of pleasure and joy from sexual and emotional life is compensated by increasing the health and enrichment. His symbol of power, usually in the form of money. He keeps the harsh hand of iron discipline in the house. The father works hard and cares about the safety of their capital. This structure of personality is often very successful in the business world. This type of neurotic men associated with the strict norms of the Patriarchal way of life, as a child, a boy identified themselves with authoritarian father, believing that this way of life is the only correct. Discipline, order, physical punishment - all of this is normal life.
If one of these men woman have to say to him: "You are the weakest link, goodbye! " But where do we get the ideal man, if women themselves continue this vicious chain? When they together form a vicious circle. Of course, in real life there is no pure representatives of a role is predominant unconscious motive of behavior, which causes resonance in the soul of the woman, with a corresponding melody, thus complementing each other. There are two possible outcomes: either to find his neurotic mate and to live in peace without vertriebene, or move in the direction of personal development, so that all the weak links have been strengthened and therefore attracted a strong link of the opposite sex, forming an unbroken chain of love, trust and respect.
Source:
Lipstick
No comments:
Post a Comment