1. Loneliness in the crowd
Alone in the crowd - syndrome metropolis, unpleasant Annex fee for high wages and domestic comfort. The city sets its unnatural fast paced life, when to communicate becomes just once. Morning "Hello" to a neighbor in the Elevator, exchange of news with colleagues at work, discussing diet with a fitness trainer, tired, "Hello-how-things-all-good", the abandoned wife before going to sleep...
And besides, there is a glut of contacts during the day. There is a kind of intoxication superficial socializing with random people, so we can no longer take communion present, deep - friendly, family, love. After all, if the day to stuff my face with chips, a delicious homemade dinner just will not go in the throat...
When something is in surplus, it depreciates. This law is true for market and for relations: the more forced contacts, the more people around, the less I want to see around yourself to others. Remember the shot of films in which the heroes find themselves on a desert island and finally get on each other's appreciate!
2. Our society to communicate does not have - it seems-is not provided.
In Soviet times were youth organizations, mugs, yard... Now section for a child - the question of parents ' income, and to let him go unattended to walk in outlying residential area - all the same what to get in a dark forest and left to the wolves. But the desire to be among their child does not disappear, but in adolescence increases, so he finds a company, sometimes not the best.
Ignored the need for communication and other age groups: households disappeared benches for seniors, tables, on which were placed dominoes and chess... we Have almost no clubs for pensioners. And if a bench in the yard itself, the room for meetings in the cold season is not so easy to find.
3. Who is the friend?
"Each person" is not the dog, and the Kid would ask parents not about the dog, but about your game console. Arrival Carlson he would not have noticed. Except that he had brought would be a new computer. Then they played into it beside me in silence, exchanging replicas "on the case"...
A person can be represented as a flower with serdtsevinki and petals. Petals - emotional attachment, ideally to other people. But if these petals are already occupied, then the other person the place is not there. Remember Pontius Pilate and his favorite Bang? "You agree to place all their devotion to the dog. Your life is scarce, the hegemon". While modern man puts his affection even in the animal and inanimate object: laptop, iPhone... this year in Japan, was registered a marriage between 28-year-old man and a pillow with a picture of the heroine of the anime! For a living person designated next. Our emotional attachment gets technical mechanisms, not the people.
4. Internet
Internet communication is useful and interesting. For one "but": if it does not displace the dialogue real. And that is what often happens... "Communication" involves not only the exchange of information through symbols, whether words or emoticons. There is something that can't pass the Internet, even reached in its evolution to "Skype": the touch, the smell, the warmth of another person...
In addition, friendship offline "greenhouse" and safe. That's why it and prefer so many - so much easier. You can navrati with three boxes, without explanation, to put in the blacklist friend, and you yourself can at any time to exit the chat... Not formed and important skills group communication - finding your place, role...
Especially dangerous substitute for real communication Internet for "fragile minds", that is, children and adolescents. In psychology there is a concept known as "sensitive period", which can be translated as "Every vegetable has its season." Then there are certain skills should be at my age, if the time is missed, then it is difficult to catch up. Never learned in time to talk to the child in adulthood will face big problems.
Internet communication should be the addition of real communication, but not substituting his surrogate. Because man is in virtual reality to believe more than this. In the same social networks have someone in the list of "friends" you can see 500 - 700 people. What kind of friendship is this? Is that a surrogate...
5. Education
The system of education is mainly aimed at the development of the intellect, the assimilation of new information and the ability to handle it. But communication skills are no forms - say, do occur, the child learns not alone, but with other children...
My blue dream is that in high school there was a special subject of "healthy communication". In my opinion, life would then later on in the adult world much easier and more enjoyable.
The thing is that to communicate we all love. Because man - pack or herd creation, not a loner. But at the same time to communicate most of us do not know how, so proudly from the needs of refuse. Like a bawling child: "Well, no, I never really wanted". Say "once", or start to run away in a secure virtual communication... and even declared himself a "self-sufficient individuals and refuse friendship, marriage, losing family ties...
It is not the fact, that in the hour of death someone a glass of water filed. Suddenly, as a joke, and true drink not want to. It is important that throughout life there was someone who can bring that same glass or Cup of tea... The one for whom you're happy to do something good... And "just", as in a children's cartoon...
Author:
Solov'ev I.
Source:
Our psychology
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