The secret female showarchive long and successfully solved: it is enclosed in two modest notions of money and men. One for the money ready to break any man. Other for a man willing to break any money. Secret men's irresistible too long ago solved, it is no less a female lies in two concepts of money and women. One for the money ready to go for female heads. Other a female head ready to pour any money. Anyway, the money is in the relationship - aspect of the global, but delicate. Discuss indecent. But we adaway the pan will not be intimidated. We will discuss and eventually decide. Who, with whom, when and for what money.
To count money in a pair and not accepted, not all of my friends pair frankly ready to talk about it. This particularly applies to the wealthy. They are hard to pretend that money schemes in the family are settled amicably, and sometimes without any involvement. We Gopher happy, that's our secret! It was interesting for me to know if I should be between a man and a woman clearly built, along with sexual, physical connection? Crumbling whether for money marriages and how? Should automatically counter at the time that we give to men? Clenenie money humiliating or satisfactorily?
I, for instance, was convinced that the trade relationship is inappropriate. I myself earn shampoo and shoes. And if I can't earn, and live without them. Money in a relationship is the plane of amphibians and reptiles, spineless and baccarani. Well, in the extreme case, this plane for forty and poodles. But not for sweeping birds. And not for clinographic Afghan hounds. Money love is measured by those who measured only in centimeters and kilograms, who himself is only in the corridors and walls, who himself is only on the tables of pasportistki and electronic profiles of Facebook. To measure the love of money is as blasphemous as to measure the death volume of the tombstones. Not my.
And here I am, a big mountain bird, despisers of those that are monetary measure, fly over relations as a garbage bag over the landfill. Around-around, but everything by cash. Unfortunately, for some reason in my life relationship was fractured due to financial problems. Somewhere, it means I made a mistake?
My money very at odds with family values. Even my eighty-year-old grandmother, who heard about my new novel, immediately asked: "What type of car he drives? And the apartment have? " I sighed heavily. I deeply don't care. For me such things as "Man-Money-I should not overlap in the same linguistic plane. I do not accept expensive gifts - I am ashamed. It's hard for me are sitting in the restaurant at his expense - I am ashamed. I reject any help - I'm ashamed. I am offended financial guardianship - I'm ashamed. In the end, all my more or less serious relationships developed one boring scenario: at first he protested, but then relaxes and becomes lazy noblewoman waiting offerings. And so every time I dissatisfaction was found next to a man who not only graciously accepts my gusts everywhere to pay off your card, but takes them as a given. So, the money issue is still in my life set.
When a man earns a lot, and the woman does not earn or earn but little, she automatically like a real yogi becomes an attitude of "asking". And we must pay tribute to the men that this position the woman are trying to facilitate: give, give, put. And somehow the money was shared, and the dependence is dissolved in a kaleidoscope of everyday problems. But there is a category of men who pose different really like, and "asking" is a favorite. They not only enjoy the contemplation, but on top of his head put to even lower bend, bend or break at all.
I had two friends. One left her husband-an Englishman. He toothpicks called "expensive" and wife "Rangiroa". Contorted face with disdain, were unfastened from her purse with distrust, and studied with a magnifying glass and suspicion. Another friend of mine still happily married, although her husband wholly dependent. Forgot to say that it is, of course, a bit of a prostitute, and he is a terrible crocodile. But it is neither he nor she wasn't embarrassed. To ask her husband's money for her daily ritual, and this lovely morning tradition does not humiliate. Because it does not lose anything, and what is the result! Bag-coat-machine. Crocodile it occasionally gwbasic and threatens to cut off oxygen support, but then departs, purrs and caresss. And again bag-coat-machine.
Money - my terrible complex. Anyone shipping their problems I don't want. Afraid to seem clever, poor, inconsistent and dependent. Very afraid that I won't like. I will pay itself all will be treated, she'll give herself handbags will convey. And indeed, I'm always worthily earned and men's gifts was strongly disown. I love to give my boys the expensive things. Love to look like a man, and try to squeeze money wherever you can. And it's all terribly ashamed and embarrassed at it. But I can't help themselves. What?! What is the result? Yes, no. I continue to be in varying degrees, one or lonely.
For instance, this story. I gave my ex-boyfriend birthday guitar. He dreamed of such. To buy it, I had to spend two-thirds of his annual bonus. I work hard to earn your bonus, and too much that I want. Guy this did not work at all. I would certainly buy him a sweater, or a video game, or a new phone. But I know that truly happy it will make only guitar for a few thousand dollars. He is a musician. He likes music and I liked a. And I think: "Money - nonsense. Why do I need all the money in the world, when I have my boyfriend? I'm very happy today, so let gears of happiness and running in full force! " And here I give the money. This purchase for me as a kind of reckoning with the Almighty revealed for happiness. All the money can burn, if only my boyfriend loved me. God does not like to haggle. He never feels the love in cash. So my attempts to bribe him suffer a complete collapse. The guy left me and somewhere far away in another country became a thousand times happier without me, but with a new guitar for thousands of dollars.
If a man earns less than you, at first it is not scary, but then sickening. Heard a lot of stories when couples break up, because the man himself to respect stopped on the background of the fact that the wife must respect him ceased. Or just no background. And how would a woman tried to relax, in the long run, unfortunately, nothing will come of it. One of my friends worked hard for three. The husband worked as he could, but soon left without work. Well, no luck he. Very worried, running through the interviews was nadraival floors and cooked dinners. She once came home from a meeting, and he fixed her shoes and shows her. She looked with gratitude, but with regret and the kitchen was. He began to drink. Then came the divorce. Later, however, and work was found, but it is no matter now. But there is another story about how a girl her boyfriend did, because he too could not find. He didn't ask like him to help. But she loved and this assistance was in the dependency. Food to bring in the house to clean, cigarettes, gasoline, and new jeans. She works with bags home on the wings runs, and he with beer at home on the couch lies. Parasitizes. She - zero attention. It it still pushed around managed: why sausage my favorite bought? Why dressed somehow? Why you so small/big, happy/sad, stupid/smart? Why are you in General? He is still in this home bondage stuffed zucchini leaves and head to the beat of his homilies shakes. Improved.
No, of course I want to be cared for me. But only so that the courtship was not left to me of the imprint obligation or suspicious interest. A hundred times heard young people (and it doesn't matter financially successful or not) guilty threw ALL the GIRLS: "Yes they only need that money from us to swing"; "I Have no chance, I have no sports car"; "Normal unselfish girls now in the afternoon with fire...". Well, now. I'm not that girl. Money and gifts to leave behind the door. All to myself I will buy, just give me a little love. But this turns out to be unsustainable, unaffordable gift.
There are girls who say money is not important, but they count their money. Its especially, and others - lidded look. That's not going to pay for them the guy in the cafe, they put a tick. Will not buy expensive birthday present - a couple of ticks. Not's service delivers to relax in the summer - a whole flock of wild crows will fly! And like these girls want love, but daws to put continue. And that's fine. This is a clever girl. Money they do not see the dump truck with food and offerings, and male power, reliability and responsibility. They very much see his sharp eye and remain with those who are still able to pay. Who will condemn these girls? Yes God forbid!
My dearest friend Tanya yells at me as a victim, every time hears about generosity and generosity on my part in relation to men. "All you're an idiot! - she hisses into the phone. Yes when you'll get that men need to invest in the us?! The more money they you spend, the harder it leaving us. And you, with your financial tantrums being humiliated. Relax, let finally they will do something. Well, and then always in memory will remain something as a souvenir".
Well, when there is a common budget and people approximately equal in their financial capacity. What if started on an equal footing, and then the wife went sharply in my career? That seems to be your wife, but the wife only outlines. Or husband has dramatically richer, stronger, jerked forward, and my wife for his speed auto on the scooter trying to catch? I heard such stories. Many are hidden behind the horizon, leaving those who cannot catch up. Many quietly inside and eat from envy and other biting begin. And there are those who each other are proud of and support. And if it so happened, that life is redistributed financial role, it does not mean that has changed the role of the human.
"My husband on the birth of a son gave me a Mercedes," says a colleague. "And me on our anniversary gave the ring" echoed her the same counterpart. "My mistress is. I know. He started me regularly to give Cartier" - proudly inserts another office lady. For men zatarivanie - form jettisoning. The deeper the market form penetrates into a relationship, the weaker and more vulnerable become these relations for the endless gifts of payments. And these women fall in direct dependence on Chanel, Bulgari, Maldives and Gardens, as compensation for insolvent love or for something that has already taken place. And kind of gift is a manifestation of love, but for some reason from such gifts gets hurt.
Do we have the right to look each other in the purses? Require love in the form of gifts, not kissing? Relationship is when you have everything in common. One body, four legs and four hands. There is no payment and payments, no payments and allocations. So ever will and I have. At least I dream about it.
"Went to Greece," says my friend. "I can't, I have no money". - Hey, you generally have nothing to worry about, I assume. Left their passport data". - "Forgive me, but I really won't happen. Maybe some other time." I didn't go to Greece then. But this invitation for me still means a lot. I think if I did, I would not forgive myself, and would have a lot of unpleasant moments of uncomfortable obligations. And so... Just magical realization that someone is willing resolutely and unconditionally "to take everything on yourself." Sometimes the offer hands and hearts much more beautiful than the marriage itself.
Money relations - not my subject. I work with this text from myself (in a dream. At least for text and zaputatsa money, love him, I no longer was, and syllable from this beautiful, too, did not. Yesterday I tried to change its approach. Went to meet the guy in the cafe. Ordered a carrot cake and lemonade. Don't like neither. We sat, talked heart to heart. Bring the account. All my life it was at this point I have stretched out my hand and said shyly: "I would like to take part". But today, I furiously clenched my teeth, sit, silent and smiling. The guy pulls out a map and pays. We depart. I felt that internal breakdown. I am sure the more we'll never meet.
Source:
Elle
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