Sometimes we want to end the relationship when the first difficulties, hoping that the other partner will be different. But you just need to understand that problems are a natural part of the relationship.
Collectors impressions
More and more people are engaged in hoarding of thrills, these days are valued achieve fast. We behave as if the whole point of our lives - including what can be achieved quickly. And this is increasingly. Extreme sports, running up the career ladder, easy money, exotic travel... And it is exactly this kind of attitude can lead to a crisis in relations between two people! It generates a certain way of thinking that turns reality into illusion. So there is a mistaken belief that life can be lived without pain, only to get pleasure and quickly meet their own needs. Imagine the following situation: a strong woman learns that her husband has changed. What does it do? She tries to act quickly, so as soon as possible to stop their suffering. And decides to part with her husband. Because next month there will be someone with whom, she believes, will be able to build a new harmonious relationship. And to understand the crisis and to establish relationships between partners takes time - it can't be done in five minutes. Individual therapy often lasts for years. The problem is that a strong woman does not want to think anything about your pain, nor about the true reasons for his defeat. If you were in a similar situation, give yourself time to think about. A thorough analysis of the problem is the only way to protect yourself from making the same mistakes with new partners.
A side effect of haste
In the offices of psychologists all over 30-year-old patient with symptoms of depression. This ailment generation, widespread throughout the world and second among the diseases caused by the negative influence of society. All depressive episode can last at least six months, then it is not excluded relapses. The reasons for this? Stress, irregular working hours and fatigue. We live fast, too fast! And often, while we will not touch the depression, we rely on luck, not caring about yourself. We do not think about what consequences that we are not giving each other enough attention. If you see your partner just a few hours at the weekend, don't wait for miracle, your relationship will not be perfect. Love is not given once and for all. Feelings need to be protected. Otherwise emotional connection weakens, and the partners begin to seek support and proximity to the side, out of their relationship.
Erosion feelings?
It is amazing how many people did not accept the fact that relationships change throughout our lives. The first stage of love is usually very pleasant and easy. But when we become each other's familiar, mutual interest is reduced, there are stairs. Psychologists have found that many young people have a fully formed idea of a family life. And often in the Studio is that they don't even try to correct the vision. It seems to us that family happiness is eternal symbiosis with another person. And this is idealization. Many of us have unrealistic requirements to the partner. If you at first sight ready to assume the guy of your spouse, be sure that you will soon face the reality, and he will cease to seem to you ideal. You will not be ready to see someone else in this person.
Crisis is good
Psychologists comforted us by the fact that the crisis is not a tragedy, but a normal stage of a relationship. It occurs in different periods: when you start to live together when one of you loses a job, when a child is born... And in those moments you need to set new rules and redistribute your responsibilities. If you are experiencing a crisis, don't take it as the end of the world. In the psychological help is often visited by people who say: "since we are so terrible curse, then one way out - divorce". And only in the course of therapy, they begin to understand that the crisis is something natural. It helps to develop you and your partner, without such shocks have had a period of stagnation. Because this problem occurs, you have to look for new ways to solve it. When you overcome difficulties, your relationship will be on a level above. This will give your Union forces and energies. Because the joint crisis is reaching a new level of partnership proximity.
Cute gestures
Slow the pace. Passing by a shop with a pleasant trinkets, buy something loved, and finding him at home, ask how his day. After taking care of the senses is not a chore. Sometimes one friendly gesture. The main thing is to be attentive to your spouse. As the situation persists, it is easy to guess that you're also affect it. Really, you're co-writer relationship and, by the way, perhaps you are repeating a pattern of behaviour that is harmful to relations with the opposite sex. The problem is that many women find it difficult to admit it, and the responsibility for the failures they are trying to pass on to other. As well as the maximum problem emerges in the relationship with your partner, it is the easiest way to assign a scapegoat. But sometimes it is necessary to look for the source of his troubles in itself. At the beginning of a relationship it is a partner interested in our every sigh. But then she gets tired of the role of the donor, it may also be tired and miserable. And he has the right to feel self-care.
Source:
Women's information portal
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