Interest in the opposite sex awakens in man long before society will allow him (her) this interest to fully meet. The first information about sex we all derive from conversations with school friends or friends who inexplicably turn out to be more than we are aware of this delicate issue. It is clear that teenagers talk about sex 99% consists of fantasies and myths, and therefore not so much enlightens many breeds illusions. A little grown up, we get to the forbidden videos like "Caligula", in which the most impressive scenes could make boys a severe inferiority complex, and the girl has a deep aversion to sex, bordering on frigidity. Having finally their first sexual experience, we are convinced that the stories of friends were mostly froth and stories porn correlate with reality, as "Star wars" program "Vesti". Then, to dispel his increasingly obvious ignorance and to learn how to finally get a real pleasure, we, as a serious adult men, seek expert advice. The benefit of those in our enlightened era abound. Those who are in their Teens do not have my say for the evening on these topics, willing to take on them to write. And we are both in school years trustingly listened to "sophisticated" peers, and now not even ask the question: why have so many experts-sexologists in the country, where a few years ago admittedly sex? We naively believe: if a competent authority calls the tricky word "cunnilingus" what school mates grins called ugly and rude, then his judgment can be trusted and his advice should be followed. Although the price of these tips is often as low.Most sexological recommendations, at first glance, it is impossible to find fault, and to challenge them is not accepted. But it is only at first glance. But we will try. Take an arbitrary number of recognized judgment, printed in glossy magazines and clever books, and will try rationally to value them based on their own life experience, common sense and the ability to analyze information.
1. Partners should not hesitate to discuss with each other the details of their intimate relationships. Only when you will know what you like in bed, what would you both like, your relationship will be full.
English language (Yes, any) is not very suitable for romantic communication on this topic. If, as is common in adolescents, "to call a spade a spade, it's easy to pass vulgar and spoil the most pleasant experience. Special terms here is not very good: "fellatio" though sounds very similar to "Cinzano", but the taste is not affected. Besides, where is the guarantee that the partner was reading the same clever books that you, and not tell you in the perverse inclinations? Anyway, discuss with your partner what type of orgasm is superior to what degree that is much better to enter, is unlikely to create in your bedroom atmosphere of high eroticism. Finally, in addition to speech, the people have always used sign language and gestures, and in this case the language is much preferred. It is the Department's inappropriate to swing his arms, and it is necessary to clarify and substantiate. In bed, on the contrary, to explain better hands. Oh, and all the rest. And the language, to speak it is not necessary. But if you want to talk, just say how you feel good, nice, wonderful. And to say exactly when this is true, thereby demonstrating to your partner that you like. If you don't like, simply grimace, frown, pull lips. If the partner is not a fool, will quickly realize the difference and will do everything correctly. And if the fool, why do you need it?
2. Women's emotional involvement in sexual relations is much higher than that of men, whose reactions are more physiological. So the woman takes a long emotional foreplay, the man (at least, "true") - "always ready".
Such differences actually exist, but are not male or female nature, and traditional features upbringing. From an early age the girl encourage baby plush: boy mucosity the ball and snapping a plastic revolver. She was a beauty, what a gentle", he is "the horror, what Tomboy". And the children obediently learn how to behave. The boy eventually learns that he has a high sexual activity, and that he much ready for immediate gratification, and the girl - that she was modest, tender and very emotional. And just try to behave otherwise, will immediately raise the suspicion of "sexual orientation". In the men who actually are no less romantic and sentimental than their girlfriends (those, on the contrary, it is often rational and pragmatic), I'm afraid to show it, so as not to drop perverse misinterpretation of machismo. And the woman can not afford intimacy without cloying ADO not to pass lustful naughty girl. Actually both want the same and equally. And truly intimate relationship even reshape the Puritan script. Spotted: a passionate young man becomes self-conscious, loving girl smiley. When a man is eloquent talks about their feelings, they are probably not very strong. The woman is really attracted to the man, not going to fool his head silly rituals.
Psychologists have noticed excitement in humans, the pupils become dilated. This reaction is involuntary, it is impossible to control. Subjects volunteers were shown films with different content and fixed dilated pupils. Landscape sketches and scenes from everyday life did not cause any changes neither in men nor in women. But when you view sex scenes pupils in men has doubled. The women in this eyes... was expanded even more!
Conclusion: if a woman requires a thorough preparation for the next, you were not mistaken in the choice of men? A man whose partner is required a long time to fix, one would suspect: if erotic motives led her into bed?
3. During sexual intercourse it is advisable to change positions and to improve the technique of coitus.
Experts, sexologists strongly argue that the diversity of positions can give a wide range of erotic sensations. Many people sincerely believe the best sexological manual the Kama Sutra, composed in large part of acrobatic feats. A much more sober look at experts everyday profile - ambulance, which you have to extract from the alcove "disabled love" with dislocated knees, elbows, fingers, or even something worse.
Actually a couple who are attracted to each other tender feelings, quickly finds the optimal combination of phone and then not too fond of acrobatic experiments. When feelings no, it is time to remember the catch phrase grandfather Krylov: "And you, my friends, no matter how you sit..."
4. Permanent sexual relationship is at risk of becoming everyday routine. To avoid this, for the recovery of visual sensations need to diversify the sexual rules of the game, often change its time and place.
The thrills you undoubtedly are guaranteed, if you try to persuade the partner to the next, when he hastily after Breakfast, going to work or is on the verge of returning from the store with full shopping bags products. And, of course, when tightened on the chandelier, the world is seen differently. And especially when the chandelier not withstand the pressure of passion. Even when at the peak of sensations tipped office chair, or when you are so unfortunate slip in the wet tub. And if you decided to play "Nine and a half weeks, keep in mind that the ice cube is possible to achieve local frostbite, and the whole condensed milk, you don't have to lick his / her intimate places have then tedious to wash with linen. By the way, the heroine Kim bassinger this treatment survived for long, although at first enthusiasm was more than enough. Do you have more of it?
5. The main condition of sexual activity men is the level of content in the blood of the hormone testosterone, so should take care of it improving.
Renowned biologist Alan Fisher, experimenting with testosterone, introduced into the brain of experimental rats-males of this hormone, hoping to cause high sexual excitement. However, to the surprise of the researcher, the male suddenly appeared... maternal instinct, and instead to mate with implantable him a female, he began to nurse. So the representatives of the stronger sex, who vigilantly monitor the level of testosterone and increase its various chemical methods should be prepared for the fact that one day when the partner they will have an irresistible desire to feed her breast.
6. Joint trips to the sex shops are able to make sexual intimacy a pleasant variety.
Contemplation bright pink porous rubber products, in principle, does not bring harm, and may even amuse. Some toys cause real emotion and awaken teenage fantasy. Moreover, in contemplation, you can make the psychological subtext. Man, not daring at the right time to make a simple request, can silently to let my lady to the window, which displays the puppet head with invitingly open elastic lips. If the lady finds a hint of offensive, can be repaid, looking at the Dildo the size of a stick of salami. Buy all of this is optional: if you have decided on this joint excursion, certainly you have the ingenuity to do home remedies. From what is consumed inside, the better to abstain. Nakushalis Spanish flies or ginseng balls, you will surely achieve a bright inner feelings, but hardly erotic. Well, if you are caught fixtures for extreme sex, this is a serious occasion for introspection. If for full enjoyment requires whip or handcuffs, there might be a better price to pay for the consultation of the psychotherapist?
7. In intimate relationships, there is nothing to be ashamed of. All that is natural is not ugly.
You can argue about what is actually natural. Individual points of view on this matter can vary greatly. If one partner has to overcome disgust or pain, to please another, it is hardly possible to speak of genuine intimacy. Normal, healthy, not burdened by prejudices person is willing to try almost all of what he knew was doing the same as he (she). But if it brings no pleasure, on the contrary, further sacrifices are meaningless. And useless accusations of conservatism and inertia. Some people enjoy eating goat veins, other - ant eggs, the third dog chops. How would you react to the fact that some of them will invite you to share a meal?
P. S. Someone probably thought that all these judgments belong to the dense ignorant, not understanding the intricacies of intimacy. Let it be so. But there's no stupid tips on birch to grow peach blossom. Because all such tips worthless when two people try to make each other happy. What and how they are with each other to do wonderful they will solve themselves. The main thing is that TWO of them were on this consensus. And no third with his advice they need.
Author:
Ariskin P.
Source:
Our Psychology
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