Getting in the men's team, many women think that a successful career advancement will greatly contribute to the beauty, charm and femininity. This is true, but only partly. Sometimes these fine quality can become a weapon against yourself in the hands of male colleagues.Stereotypes
Asya was slender, blue-eyed and blond. Despite the many jokes about dumb blondes, she's never been bothered by this fact, because she had learned better than anyone on the faculty, and the teachers put her in an example of the clever-by-four.
After graduation, she successfully completed an internship in one of the foreign company and was invited for a permanent job there, only at a higher position.
Now the girl was a serious piece of work and a new boss who was skeptical about a young employee. He gave her a job far below her qualifications and ten times explained what needs to be done.
Asya did not understand what was happening, but one day she overheard a conversation chef with one of the employees.
"Why don't you give it to a novice, this directly relates to its responsibilities? he asked the guy.
"You look at it! Unless she can make such a complex analysis? Blonde in short, it was to take it! with a sigh, " replied the chef.
Asya was shocked by this explanation, because the chief has drawn conclusions based only on her appearance and didn't even give her a chance to show your professionalism!
All blondes are stupid, all brunette passionate, women are too sensitive, women do not know how to drive a car, women are illogical... How many prejudices still sits in the minds of men?!
Stereotypical thinking is typical of many people, because stereotypes can help you find quick answers in the world. Although not all stereotypes are true, to break through them is very difficult.
It is almost impossible to make stereotypical thinking man to treat you as an individual and not as a type, which, in his opinion, you ought to be. If you perceive stereotypical means, don't see your identity.
Olga was the brown hair, but so small and frail that looked much younger than his years.
The girl had a balanced character, soft and feminine style of communication. This did not prevent her to create a very profitable business and achieve great success in your career.
One day she met a classmate who had not seen for many years. After a story about his successes he asked Olga what she was doing. It looked something like this:
- So, how was the job? Probably married to a wealthy and do not work at all?
When she told what she was doing, the classmate was taken aback and said:
"You're sorry but you're so soft, gentle, I thought you capable of working in a salon as a hairdresser!
If someone treats you stereotype, you have an unconscious desire to behave as you expect.
If a man treats you, as a father, you are tempted to behave childishly, if you see a fatal woman, you gradually become a real bitch.
On the other hand, you may want to ensure that people saw you in person, and not the shell. And by all means try to prove that it is not the same as everyone thinks. This tactic is as bad as the first, because it can lead to serious conflicts, because people don't like to be wrong in their assessments.
Stereotypes in your favor!
Frustrating when you can't see the person. Even unpleasant when other people's stereotypes hinder your career advancement. If you underestimate, you have hidden advantages that can get in the most unexpected moment.
If a man sees you dumb blonde, you will catch him by surprise with its competence and power. Mary used a similar method in negotiations with customers and partners. When they saw the fragile girl, then instantly relaxed and lost vigilance, thinking that it is essential to create pressure not difficult at all.
But Masha instantly became hard and persistent tigress when it came to discussing the important points of the deal. Opponents were lost from her unexpected professionalism and hardness, and the girl received a great advantage in negotiations.
To explain and to show initiative. If a prisoner of the stereotypes were your boss, then no explanation is necessary. If the boss gives you a job below your level of competence, be sure to ask, what is the reason, and explain that you can do more, presenting the facts.
Facts can be your previous successful experience, education, training, completed projects, customer reviews, evaluation of staff, and just your competent suggestions for accomplishing this task.
You can directly ask the chef about the reason of his relationship to you. For example: "You can't trust me this job because I'm younger than their colleagues? Or because they do not trust the blonde? "
The best way to get rid of stereotypes is not to pay any attention and being yourself, by being active on an equal basis with men and systematically achieving professional results.
Diminutive names
"Introducing Svetochka", presented to business partners, head of marketing Department Svetlana Anatolievna her colleague, with whom he appeared at the international conference. Himself he identified by name and patronymic, in detail, listing all their regalia.
Have you ever at business meetings, meetings, etc. to hear appeals "honey", "baby", "baby", "darling" and the like tenderness? Do they call you at work not Olga, and Yenikoy, not Tatiana Petrovna, and by Tanechka, if you take a position much higher than a Secretary?
Sometimes, you represented simply by its name and your partner name, middle name or with the prefix "Mr.", calling him the position, highlighting the status and achievements?
People who so wants to show you your place, to show that you stand below it. This is not conducive to respect you as a specialist, and career advancement.
It is an affectionate diminutive of the name may seem very nice, but, despite this, their use is the most common male trick.
What to do?
Yourself. You can introduce yourself and ask the person to treat you properly. If he called you because of habit (if such appeal is made between you), he will immediately apologize and will consider your request.
Ignoring. If your request had no effect, you are dealing with a cunning manipulator. The best tactic in this situation is to ignore such treatment and not to respond to them.
If you show irritation, such appeals will be hard to get rid of, because you yourself have shown the enemy the best way to pull you out of balance.
The humor. Show your amazement that you are genuinely surprised playful manners opponent. You can answer, too, to call it affectionate diminutive nickname.
This does not mean that you definitely need to respond to all such appeals. If this does not limit you, not dropping your image, you should not fight with windmills.
Humiliating requests
Eugene got a job in a consulting company and worked on my first project. Relationships with colleagues went well, all respected her and considered her opinion.
More surprising was for girls what happened at the meeting with the clients. Suddenly during the talks, the head of the company asked Eugene to bring all coffee. The girl, from the comfort of negotiation, dial the internal phone number of the Secretary and passed the order in the hands of the perpetrator.
Eugene worthy came out of this situation, not leaving important talks and showing that the level of competence is much higher than the supply of coffee.
If you occupy a high position, and you are asked for coffee at the meeting or to make copies of documents only because you are the only woman, you again want to specify in your place and to lower your status in the eyes of other people.
You want to put a girl on errands, and not a specialist whose opinion should be considered. On his guard, if such things happen in the negotiations and meetings. Such requests are served lunch, book a hotel room, and so on - are to show who's boss.
What to do?
To warn. Direct refusal can only lead to serious conflict. Consent once and for all will assign you the role of the girl in this story. It is best to prevent this behavior and in advance to ask the Secretary to do such things.
If you do not have time to prepare, try to call the Secretariat and enjoy a coffee.
Always with humor, say: "of Course, I'll now ask Lyuba from the Secretariat, it brews great coffee" or "Girls of the Secretariat will make copies for five minutes".
In General, the best way to get out of such situations is not to interfere, and with humor to shift this responsibility on the shoulders of specially trained people.
Source:
Female passion
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