Girls to the left, boys to the right
"So these... (insert right)! Only about sex and talk! " - hear an angry female voice. But do not rush to accuse us of too much concern. Everything has a cause.
That we are from different planets, much has been written and eloquent. About the planets will not say, but that is different from the locker room in school gyms, different chambers in pioneer camps, that's for sure.
And pre-conscription Commission generally demonstrated its advantages in splendid isolation. However, to the military Commissariat period the relationship between sex and numbers already embedded in our immature organisms at the level of the conditioned reflex. Starts all different. It's all about luck. But we must go through the notorious measurement centimeters, wacky competitions from the series "And your how many pounds will it hold? "but, most importantly, through the education of dubious legends of not less dubious exploits of our elders. And just as adults, understand that these feats were accomplished only in the excited minds of the young lovers overcome age-related hormonal surges. But awareness of this is the fate of the future. And when you lie under a blanket in the tent, sports camps, and your a senior fellow with the thoroughness of a breeding bull lists the names of the conquered beauties, the main thing that settles in the subcortex, are numbers. For the simple reason that all other words for you only sound, swing space. But you grow up, the sounds become flesh, the oscillations become very noticeable and even pleasant, and interest in numbers and not lost. Why? Because we are all hostages unspoken competition. So is the man. And in a time when women think about something abstract and sublime, we analyze very specific things. And what looks embarrassing and even shameful, exalts us in the eyes of others. So, the answer to the question "How many of you have partners? " may do honor to the man and thoroughly undermine the reputation of women. So don't blame us for not having the desire to count and measure. But I digress, and therefore go directly to the facts and figures.
The coveted centimeters
Immediately ask to postpone the journal particularly susceptible. And then read some citizen that person for life takes an intimate relationship 2580 times (this number brought statistics) count all thoroughly limit exhausted. And let's be hung. Why continue to live? Unfortunately, this is not a joke. In any neurological dispensary you such stories with fifty generates. Therefore, recognizing these facts from sociologists, statisticians and just curious naturalists, it is worth remembering that there are no rules without exceptions. Moreover, the rules of these data can be called a stretch, since checking them very problematic. So, the first thing I wanted to find a Mature man, of course, about inches. Who is the biggest? If we discard all sorts of tricks like vacuum pumps and other stimulants, the largest member of the registered medical Commission, reached the mark of 35 centimetres. Its owner is a John Falcon's Twister - live in the USA and is a typical example of a loser. He could become an artist, pilot, philosopher, or a champion in archery, but, alas, given the nature of manhood determined the fate of the poor. It is a sin not to take the opportunity to be the first among the first, not attaching to it the slightest effort. So the Falcon's Twister was the star of the porn industry, worked in a gay club, acted in films, but eventually retired and began to lead a secluded life, dreaming in the privacy of a career of this Hollywood star. Apparently, tired of knowing that others are only interested in his body, and on the other they frankly don't care. I will add that ill-fated dignity left a significant imprint on the personal life of John. It is not easy to find a woman who would not be scared of this "hell" thing. That's it. For the rest-the rare, the doctors estimated - million men have no more than one possessor of the phallus, exceeding the length of the mark in thirty centimetres. Squinting his eyes, and remembering the lessons of arithmetic all from the same childhood, calculated: men with such an impressive dignity on the entire planet just something about a thousand people. And what about the majority? The difference with Champions pretty impressive. It is normal for the body, reaching erections 14-18 inches (Hello, brothers! ), Regardless of the evidence gaps, seventy-five percent of men consider that the length of the member does not affect their sexuality. Believe in the word. And while they think, as if to change the subject, note - plastic surgery to increase the length of the penis almost the most popular in the world. Although research conducted by the London surgeons, showed that only one third of the operated men were satisfied with the results. However, the interest of the stronger sex to feel sexy giants is not quenched. And the roots of this phenomenon, as scientists say, need to look not in physiology. "Phallocentrism" - a psychological disorder, and therefore is not the body treat, ladies and gentlemen!
In fact, the theme of sexual obsession can be considered the most popular in erotic conversations. Among other things, here is the story: one Nick Robinson, the author of the book "Origami for adults, just over 33 minutes and 15 seconds crafted the world's largest paper penis. Its length is more than three meters. What is it with this thing to do is not clear. But not only this fact causes confusion and questions. Sexual and ecologically statistics complete unknown who mustered digits. For example, the average duration of sexual intercourse for blondes - 14 minutes. It is interesting that no information about the intimate life of brunettes, brunette and a redhead were not found. Involuntarily I want to quit and urgently investigate this question experimentally. Attention all slimming! The process of undressing requires 187 calories. When this history is silent, what and in what sequence with yourself or with someone you need to remove. Or like this: high-quality condom accommodates forty liters of air, a single dose of semen contains five calories, and in the process of copulation participate 500 million sperm. You know I never wanted to meet with Paul McCartney or the Pope, but show in weathered human eye, pereschitova all the sperm, and not just once, it would be very interesting. And finally, the most important question - why all the studies relate only to foreign countries, in the best case, the neighbor to the North? Or we have no heroes sexual front? Of course, there's. Just our mentality is such that intimate achieve compatriots silently taken out of the brackets valid for public review of the. Maybe it's for the best? The people quiet and the government does not have to puzzle over ways of resolving sexual problems. This is not the West, where for each unscheduled frictio five detailed laws.
Sex in the law
I admit, after reading the information below, in the first moment, I decided that I play. But found the information is confirmed by other sources, third. So I made sure that the ranking of the most incredible and funny laws about sex leads democratic America. For example, in Wyoming it is strictly forbidden to have sex at the entrance to the store. This is how it was necessary to Depeche honest citizens?! And seems pretty tired from your own protracted joke a couple that regularly, for example, every Thursday is the front door of the shop and well be attached to a blemish! "How long?! "says gray sold comely. "The law was not in them, or what?! " And then, Smakov, writes where necessary, time - and here it is the law! In the struggle for morality ranks not far behind and Oklahoma. Jurisdiction here is Masturbation, but only if it be given, looking for sex two strangers in a car. It seems that fans of the automotive pleasures in the state had suffered badly from the voyeurs. But all outdid Utah. A very severe punishment awaits here a woman who make love with man at that time, when he was brought to the intensive care unit. Here's a look at the heroes, which owes its origin to this law! And chaste Washington, for example, the only possible position for sex is missionary, and the rest outlawed. In Alaska the same rules for men was not limited. Therefore, it is strictly forbidden to have sex on the street moose. I wonder how they explain the illegality of their actions? When you want to drink beer during love fun in Iowa, remember - officially permitted not more than three SIPS, otherwise you face trial.
And if you are a woman and decided to go to Ohio, in no case do not bring lacquered shoes - will violate valid here the law! He argued logically: these shoes can reflect underwear and provoke strong floor on illegal immoral actions. And in Kentucky, for example, girls are forbidden to appear on the roadway in swimsuits. It is quite clear - the law advocates for road safety. A smile causes the second part, which States: "the Exception is when a girl in a swimsuit is accompanied by two police officers,". Guess where they come from? Apparently, obsessed by the ideas of exhibitionism cantuccini cohesive groups tear on the highways, where they legitimately lead the guards. Not less than two per unit nudity. And in Arizona jurisdiction to have in the house more than two dildos. Inexplicable decision. One can only dream and imagine, that made it a man, woman whom he chose soulless stimulator, and then got involved and began to change vibrators as gloves. In Pennsylvania also forbidden to make love with a truck driver in his car. Immediately arises in Slavonic enterprising question: if you were to get in the car, his colleagues, it will immediately cease to be a crime? In General, dear fellow citizens, we live with you in a civilized, highly democratic in terms of sex country. And give the eye a stable average: lose their virginity at eighteen, married at twenty-three, give birth at twenty-five and most preferred traditional orientation, which cannot be said about many other.
SEX-geography
Tireless sociologists of Albion for five years he studied all aspects of sexual life of the inhabitants of Sweden, the UK, France, Netherlands, USA, Canada, India and Malaysia. In the result of a Herculean effort has uncovered the terrible truth. Before all start to live a sexual life the Germans - at the age of seventeen. Later all - Indians - in twenty-one men and eighteen women. Remember that German sex in the minds of most of us is marked with the label "primitive" (Das East fantastic. Oh, I-I. ), and Indians. It seems anyone knows the word "Kama Sutra". So, go see. The French are also marked in the minds of the lovely ladies of particular interest as unrivalled craftsmen in love and in General. turned out to be the most prone to homosexual contacts. Almost five percent of the male population of this country has admitted that at least once in my life had homosexual contact. So, kind fairies, dreaming about the French lover, be careful. At this point he may dream not about you. But the Scandinavian Vikings have confirmed the reputation of these men. Less than two percent of Swedes admitted homosexual campaigns. As for feminine love, here ahead of the rest of American. Almost four percent of the residents of the States tried to become lesbians, and many did it. Europe in the "pink" issue cool behind. Contrary to the image of the most sexually-democratic, only slightly more than one and a half percent of ladies ever been interested in other women. But the bonds of hymen before others bind themselves Indian girls. Correct a resident of this exotic country is getting married in twenty years. While the blond Froilan to the burden of family care is not in a hurry. The average age of the German bride is twenty-seven years. And this despite the fact that to live a sexual life, they begin, as we remember, in seventeen! Apparently the rule of three "To" (children, kitchen, Church) still scares emancipated German women. And again pulled forward America. It is undoubtedly the world leader in the number of divorces.
On average, each year there disintegrates almost five percent of marriages. While there has been alarming for uncle Sam tendency to increase this figure. Yes and part of the "left" hikes here all OK. According to statistics, adultery observed in fifty percent of the U.S. population. And in private conversations with psychologists they quite frankly do not consider adultery Vice. But you can change to different. Some people prefer office romances (it basically ends badly - stained blue dress and the same reputation), and someone, without further ADO, is looking for sales love. Priestess it is everywhere, always, and in the full range. Fortunately, I was able to find data about their number not in relative and in absolute numbers. Agree, much nicer to imagine a thousand living, seductive and hot prostitutes, and not some 0, 00012% of the country population. Even if you disagree with me - write in my "pink" drive male shortcomings - so. But back to the night butterflies. The greatest number of professionalat registered in India. Here are two million three hundred thousand! Who would have thought? And the most loving men in the world recognized by the French. The average MSE sex 144 times per year.
And sensationally violent love were residents of the United Kingdom. Researchers were shocked to learn that handcuffs and other sadomasochistic stuff actively used by more than thirty-eight percent of the British. The pornography surprises are not presented. Guess who most often this way enhances your libido? Right - the same Americans. Fifty-five percent of us residents simply can not live without "strawberries". But the Germans are up to something good! Only one-fifth of the inhabitants of Germany need such heating. And to speculate about the techniques of love most of all I love the Indians, all the time surrounded himself phallic symbols. But, as grandpa used to say Freud, sometimes a cucumber is just a cucumber.
Already when the country was rising morning mist, I saw the expression: "Logic: the more people talk about sex, the less they do." Lie, do not take!
I looked on quietly wheezing under a blanket friend. "Wake up, darling, I have come to thee! " And with you, dear reader, we'll talk later, okay? For SIM forgiven, sincerely yours,
Anthology condom
The oldest condoms, dated 1670 year, was discovered in
Lund (Sweden). Found it unused. In the attached, written
in Latin, the instructions stated that this remedy
intended for repeated use, and to avoid
diseases, before applying the condom must be put on
some time in the milk. In General, the invention of the first prototype
"gum" is attributed to the Italian anatomist Gabriele Falloppio. Know-how
was a linen bag with drawstring soaked in herbal
infusions and special salts. Prior to that, from indecent diseases men
saved oil or animal fat. It was thought that the infection penetrates
through the pores, and if they are close, you can feel secure. But
linen bags not gained popularity, so wide
the distribution of condoms was only with 1712, when
conference in Utrecht on the signing of an agreement on the completion
the war of the Spanish succession, it was decided to produce tools
intimate protection from films and membranes of animal origin. However,
condoms deserved notoriety. And not only because of the predilection
to them Casanova or the Marquis de Sade. They are often used in brothels in
as contraceptives, they were saved from consequences
adultery, word, attitude to this tool, as a symbol
illicit sex, very long time it was negative. In 1840 they
were made from the caecum of sheep, and later of latex, but almost before
the end of the twentieth century the word "condom" was associated with sin, and
only in 1972 was recorded in dictionaries and encyclopedias.
A bit of fantasy and truth
Our life consists of myths and reality. The second destroys
first, but sometimes it's Vice versa. Try to understand, resorting
all the same statistics. So, men...
1. "Prefer blondes"The myth? Alas, no. Due to some inexplicable laid on
the genetic level to the ancient instinct. In short, 77 percent of men
confessed that blond women seem to them much more attractive.
2. "Choose wives in the image and likeness of his own mother". Myth. It makes only 4 percent of men.
3. "I don't want to know about past sexual relations with their loved ones." 's true. Nearly 70 percent of morbidly would have taken such information.
4. "My dream is to marry". Not only a myth, but nonsense. Only 2 percent of obsessed with this idea, for the rest it doesn't matter.
5. "Have a negative attitude towards simulating orgasm woman". 's true. Only 24 percent believed it is a common practice.
6. "I love the variety of poses in sex". Myth. 75 percent of men prefer 1-2 permanent position. The most popular missionary.
7. "More than women, love to accompany intimate process lewd comments". Myth. According to statistics, this lesson is fond of 74 percent of ladies and only 58 percent of men.
Author:
Vinogradov S.
Source:
Natalie
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