When we agree to marry a tall and thin or, on the contrary, for small and tidy (well, or not so little, but still thick), we do quite a conscious choice. We sort of agree that we love and care for his "significant" half, feed it and give birth from her chubby cheek kids. In Union with the scrawny representative of a strong half on the contrary, we are committed to the grave to listen as he rattles the bones, to watch as he bends under the weight of a single bag of groceries, and wonder why such a thin neck not sew shirts. However, the river of life flows, everything changes, and transformed forms of the beloved, and at the same time and ours too. If we are able to come to terms with this? Shrunken love
In psychology there is a term "sealing", which refers to the process of fixation of certain information in memory. That is, at the first meeting we involuntarily fix in his mind the image of the new man (for example, the way the denim guy with a guitar in his hands and curly hair to shoulders) and further hardly perceive it in another form, at least, feel some discomfort under the vague name of "something wrong". Of course, to reorient themselves, but this is not all. Especially if simultaneously with the sealing of the emerged and the so-called love at first sight.
"For her first husband, " says Marina, " I got married in mad love. But, unfortunately, the relationship didn't work out, and after a year and a half Ilya gone, and not having my consent for divorce. Several years after that, I shook each call or woke up from a barely audible rustle, hoping that HE returns. But the miracle, of course, did not happen only once appeared lawyer sent my husband for a divorce, and I had no choice as to sign all necessary documents.
Then I have a long time was in depression, believed that with the loss of the love of my life is over and the only thing I have left is work. Apparently, due to this not being distracted by men, I managed to make a career. In the course of professional job growth I twice managed to get married, but of no great love in these cases, of course, not talking.
And then one day, at the presentation of his own book on Economics, I saw
it and froze. All these years, almost ten years, I kept in mind a broad-shouldered, slim, tanned athlete, and now in the first row sat a "Hercules dried" of indeterminate age, with loose skin, which previously covered with tight muscles. I felt it's a pity that all the years I've dried up soul love this wishy-washy creation, which is hardly recognized.
The next day we met, he called, sat in the restaurant, talked. It turned out that Ilya worked for four years somewhere in Africa, fell ill there some kind of fever, then abruptly lost. I listened to his story, sympathized, but, frankly, I was more sorry for himself. I had a feeling some of substitution, the abuse of my dreams and feelings. But even more, I was afraid that he would offer me a bed, I'm afraid not wanted to be with him the way he is now, but to banish it or leave itself also does not have the strength.
By the way, my two other former husband were not at all handsome men with good physique, but I got so immediately and so did not feel discomfort. And here about the reality of a shattered dream, strangled by the way my sexuality. Apparently, Elijah understood or felt on the convergence went. I told him still grateful, though I cannot say that finally got rid of love to him."
The story is not too original. Who among us, once met a former lover or a boy who loved school, did not grew cold with horror at the thought: "But we could then get married, or at least not cried in amazement, "And with that I kissed? ". But the shock quickly goes over this episode only fun to laugh. Much worse, when exactly the same or even more horrible by the way you react former boyfriend. There certainly is no laughing matter.
The shock is, in our opinion!
"After the birth of twins, shares memories Christina, I almost dropped the weight. Friends joked that I had not all children adopted, and within a couple left. I did not really care - I was swallowed up by the kids, except that sadly sighed when my hand came across my old dresses that compared with my new figure seemed to be just a toy.
But my husband could not come to terms with my arbustorum belly and methodically teased me for being too complete. And every day methods used to fight with my excess weight, became more and more sadistic. What was the use of only one nickname, Bock, which he has rewarded me! I'm not talking about separate bedrooms... Resentment brewing, brewing. And once it all finally I got tired, I took the twins and moved to her parents. Spouse, Tesha his integrity, did not argue.
I thought that my parents would support me, but they took the side of my husband and claimed that for the sake of the family I would be hungry. Here I argued that I had not recovered from overeating, and due to hormonal changes, steps to no avail - the same way, however, and my references to fatigue and employment. But they were still testing the strength of my spirit.
On the same landing, parent lived at home my first love, long since burnt out, but left the romantic memories. Now, having met me once on the stairs, my ex boyfriend so ran in the direction that I thought about the wall will hurt. The next meeting occurred about the same thing, he just ran away from me, although the only thing I claimed, it's on duty, "Hello! ". In three months he got used to my size, began to greet and sometimes even stopped to talk when I was walking around the house with a stroller. Each time our conversations became more and more outspoken and found that we still have much in common.
And that's one of those conversations I jokingly hinted at a continuation of the relationship and all he heard was a typical form of denial, disguised as a strong employment. The same evening I saw from the window of Oleg, who slipped from the car to the entrance with a long-legged girl 42nd size version regarding employment has been confirmed. Sometimes Oleg visited me in for tea, chat and occasionally he slipped the statements that "very small Breasts still better than a very large", and so on, that was obvious, in whose garden the stone.
Needless to say, the physical transformation of the sexual partner does not always occur in the direction of quality improvement. The reverse happens much more often. But it is, in principle, not so bad, if we are talking about the relationship of "bygone days". Of course, I want to make former lover and 10 years later, and `20, and 30 (if you really try) striking impression that he got the shock of a positive nature, and not negative. But that goal associated minor victory for mood improvement. Much more difficult to endure "figuratively" changes, but to always keep a good relationship in marriage.
Men approach
Sometimes it is better not to touch anything, not to break the situation, to boom, say, weight loss is not caused by the sexual revolution. This is what happens: catch hold of one thing, and for him, everything else will be pulled and all the good intentions will turn out badly.
"A few years ago, " says Jeanne, - my husband was fond of Italian cuisine and fattening him up all the way to the 50th and 52nd sizes. Everything was good, and we loved each other. But one day, walking past the shop window, I saw my reflection in the glass and was horrified. On a diet I sat down hard, all the time thinking about food. The husband was starving with great enthusiasm, but his enthusiasm is gone as quickly as it had appeared. Anton began to cheat: eating on the street burgers, drank beer at night secretly pulled out of the fridge food. In the end, he was even better, and it was obvious that he suffers from not being able to cope with his gluttony.
But soon his feelings about acquired a strange and offensive to me form. He became verbally tease me for my desire to lose weight, mephistophelian sarcastic aloud discussed my figure and what is particularly disgusting, was unceremoniously behave in sex, mockingly calling me "strojniski".
I tried to talk to Anton about our sexual relations and about relationships in General and has heard the following: "Everyone should do what he's good at: you're losing weight, and I'm t... Yu", he said and pushed me on the bed. Here is such Powertec, and I tried so hard, and for myself, too."
"Punishment" for your own bankruptcy (diet - it's a serious test of the strength of the spirit) often goes man, not for themselves but for the partner, which is guilty of only those that have succeeded in an unspoken competition. How to put it in place? According to the logic of the male sex - a suitable case tool.
But the most important thing in this story is that, not pricavy Jeanne so much importance to his weight, sex and relationships in the family she would be all right. Hence the conclusion: it is important, not how much you weigh, and how it is stressful for you and your partner. In this regard, note:
"Most men don't like skinny and fatty, the most popular ladies "average weight".
- Important is not so much the size and scope of many forms. Yes, men like big Breasts, but shapeless and saggy they are likely to prefer a smaller but "sticking".
- Cellulite does harm to your appearance and sexuality more than the extra centimeters. A man will forgive you for excessive coverage of the hips, but the "orange peel" on any hip size will not rastrevozhat his libido.
- Cheerful fat is always greater success in men than embittered lady, directing all their efforts to lose even a few pounds.
- What size you would wear on your category of fullness or thinness has its male population, which, first of all, I like such girls like you.
- Strive to maintain at least about its "weight" throughout life, so that one did not have to change everything: closet, her husband, their own opinion on the benefits of thinness or completeness.
- Watching form, do not forget about the content. Your figure is the 44th and 54th size is just bait. Assume that the fan of your forms have been and so excited, but then. As they say, a matter of technique. Do you know it enough to keep it?
- If your life is good, and sexy including, do not dwell on the shortcomings of her figure, and you don't want whatever it was to fix them. As you know, no good deed goes unpunished. Put better emphasis on its merits.
Sex with thin
Pros:
- When close to him in the classic position you are not likely to be crushed.
- There is information that lean more lively and energetic than the stall, and tend to make love for a long time, many times, starting all over again.
- I lean more sensitive areas on the body, more precisely speaking, they are more affordable than full.
Cons:
- Bumping on his elbows and knees, you can "earn" the bruises.
With such a partner, you lose the opportunity to have sex on a weight - even if he will raise him you do not hold. - According to the statistics, most evil of all evil.
Sex with fat man
Pros:
- Fat man with a big pleasure than thin lively, will give you the initiative in bed and will allow you to gain the upper hand over you."
A fat man can more actively "turn over" - it is below the sensitivity of receptors.
- Fat is almost always carefully treat their partners because they fear to harm them.
Cons:
- Fat, straining sweating profusely.
- Fat tire more quickly than thin, because in addition to the main load them all the time necessary to make efforts to support the weight of your serious weight.
One awkward movement - and you fall 100 kg. So choosing the pose, think about safety.
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