WIFE IS IN THE KITCHEN, AND THE HUSBAND ON THE COUCH
Remember, in the movie "White sun of the desert" beauty gulchatai sympathized with Russian women: "One sews clothes, one husband, prepares meals, one erases... Hard! "? Of course, times change, and today the young wife in addition to the vague promises of the type "my darling, I will lead you to the faraway star gets quite specific mountain of dishes in the sink, vacuum cleaner and a daily watch on the plate. "Nothing can be done, dear, that your family responsibilities, " says the husband, settling himself comfortably on the sofa with the newspaper "Sport Express". - If you need to hammer in a nail, call". Sounds familiar?
By order of our publishing house conducted a sociological survey to find out how are we doing with the division of responsibilities. It turns out that almost all of the housework still perform ladies: 78% of women always cook food, 72% engaged in washing and Ironing, 70% washing dishes, 64% bring clean and tidy. And of course, take care of the children, pay for utilities, shop. While 62% of men said that their main business is to earn money. But in most cases the family budget still comes from the income of both spouses. As for other tasks, 37% of men said take out the trash, 49% change light bulbs and hammer nails, 41% do repairs. If we consider that the repair, as a rule, does not happen more than once every 5-10 years, hammer nails into the walls at about the same frequency, men only every day to take out the garbage. However, two-thirds of respondents happily escaped and this. Honestly admitted that their main occupation is to "lie on the couch and watch TV" half men! Another 12% said that they did not have any family responsibilities. Is it any wonder that the life expectancy for men is on average 10 years less than women with a sofa and TV health do not contribute.
- The results of a survey conducted by sociologists in five European countries (France, Germany, Slovenia, Romania and Bulgaria), showed that 2/3 of women's paid domestic work 16 to 20 hours per week, while 80% of men - from one to five hours. The most industrious were the French, who on average do the housework 29 hours per week.
In a survey of 5,000 married American women revealed that they were watching a fair distribution of responsibilities in the family. However, if men earn well, the wife is ready to release them from many things around the house.
- The easiest issue of family responsibilities is solved in an African tribe Malaya. Here women choose their husbands, and those who don't are working for collecting rubber and does not know how to cook dinner, refer back to the mother - if poorly educated his son, let alone with him and tormented.
WHO SPOILED MEN?
Women are to blame that completely took on the burden of family care, considers the candidate of psychological Sciences Svetlana Ivanova. - Numerous wars that were experienced by Russia in the twentieth century, has claimed millions of lives. Mostly, of course, male. Russian women know very well what the widow's share. Hence, selfless, all-consuming love for his sons. Remember, Marina Tsvetaeva wrote in his diaries: "Boys you have to spoil them for the war, might have to go." Here and indulge: moms and sons, wives - husbands. We as men still in deficit: 10 girls, according to statistics, 9 guys, and by 30 by 10 women and you're only 7 men. Here is a woman and cherish men, turning them from "hope and support", "stone wall" in decorative element of the interior.
Meanwhile the men themselves, if you believe the polls, don't see nothing wrong to assume part of the household chores. For example, 46% of Muscovites can help a woman to cook dinner or clean the house. And 33% of respondents with pleasure would hire a housekeeper to facilitate the work of the wife.
However, most men believe that women's responsibilities (and, as we found out, they include almost all homework must be carried out exclusively by my wife. No accident that the number of qualities that should have the perfect spouse, the most important along with love for children and strong loyalty floor refers to the ability to cook. In short, the way to a man's heart is still through his stomach. Interestingly, such a requirement as a decent run of marital debt in bed, show your partner in marriage only 20% of men and 13% women. And this is a very alarming symptom. Any sex therapist will tell you that families in which the wife is asleep "under different blankets", quite fragile. And it's not just physiology. Without tenderness, intimacy off the hot feelings.
REVERSED
Sometimes it so happens that life itself makes the spouses to be swapped. The husband of my friend Alina was an architect, worked in a small firm. Revenues Paul was fully consistent with the formula "it is dense, it is empty. Alina held the position of chief accountant, and its consistently high salary allowed not only to meet the immediate needs of the family, but also to save money. After the family has a second child, and the number of orders in the company of Paul fell sharply, the family Council it was decided that Alina will work, and the husband will remain temporarily "on the farm". The father of a family on the care of children - a ten-year Ira and eighteen months Anton.
The first time my husband called Alina every half hour was required detailed advice. Gradually Paul "friends" not only with Dr. Spock, but with Elena molokhovets, began to treat the family to a delicious dinner. Now among his responsibilities in addition to child care - washing, Ironing, grocery shopping.
When Antoshka go to school, Paul plans to get a job, and while implementing their creative projects in the country - last summer country house grew on one floor and got veranda. Of course, the retraining process of the architect of householder proceeded difficult. Alina, realizing that the man hard in his new role, all the while trying to emphasize how much the Pasha makes for his family and never ceases to praise him. "If you girls knew how sexy it looks a man in the kitchen! "she says to the girls.
"Men are inherently much more difficult than women to adapt to various changes in life, and especially when it comes to social status, " explains Svetlana Ivanova. - To abandon the honorary title of earner and breadwinner and fully devote themselves to the house - it takes a lot of courage. It should be noted that in this situation it is very important that the wife behaves correctly: it emphasizes the importance of what makes a man for the family. I think even when he goes to work, it will leave a part of the household chores".
ALL DIVIDE IN HALF
How to share with my husband and duties at home? "The ideal scenario is to agree with her future husband before the wedding, what part of the duties he is ready to take on, " says psychologist Svetlana Ivanova. - If a loved chooses to lie on the couch and watch TV", it's time to think whether you need such spouse. Many modern men willingly agree to accept the site, or otherwise associated with the technique. Or try another way to explain to the wife that you need free time to get a manicure or go to the hairdresser (to see my wife beautiful and well-groomed any nice), and it appears only when the husband will be, for example, to cook lunch on Saturdays. By the way, don't forget to remind that the best chefs in the world - men. Be sure to praise the resulting dish, even if you recognize the promised steak in a burnt piece of meat hard. Praise inspires, and certainly after some time, the husband will surprise you with their culinary delights.
Plan all the things together with the family. Let the plans will be long-term (General cleaning, stocking up for winter), and weekly (Laundry, cleaning), and daily. Try to free the weekend of chores, leave these days for rest".
And yet the most competent, in our opinion, the approach to family responsibilities is not to divide them into "your" and "my", "male" and "female". In happy families, the spouses do everything together.
As we were looking for a housekeeper
If funds allow, the care of the home, you can instruct the housekeeper. The market for such services have not yet formed, and often young families not immediately able to find the right option. "Before we found someone who suits us perfectly, had to change two domestic workers, " says Muscovite Irina Danilova. First itself responded to our ad. It made me a favorable impression, claims it was not the woman deliciously prepared, she was careful and conscientious. However, after some time I noticed that I began to disappear small things. First disappeared from cosmetics lipstick, then a bottle of French perfume. When the "disappeared" deliberately forgotten on the kitchen table $50, this assistant had to leave. The second maid lasted three days: I accidentally walked into the kitchen and saw that the girl lowered her finger in a Cup of cooked for me tea, so she checked how much it hot. The third maid we took the recommendation of friends. She is with us for almost a year, and we are very happy with it. Now I know that the house is all right".
No comments:
Post a Comment