In life, probably, any adult person, there comes a time when traditional forms of intimacy begin to seem humdrum and routine, like brushing your teeth before going to bed, and start to Wake up sinful thoughts about how to bring in a love relationship is a kind of flavor and variety. However, such sinful thoughts was considered more than a quarter century ago, and today there is many reasons and examples. Brilliant heroine Madonna, Sharon stone and Kim Basinger recognized standards of sexuality, display screens such variations intimacy, from which our grandmothers could easily happen fainting.One for completeness of sensations need to chain partner handcuffed to the bed of love, and the other herself prefers to be associated, and, for example, the heroine of the famous "History Of" the most powerful erotic sensations feel under the rods. One of the most vivid erotic movies - "9 ½ weeks" - is just a manual on the implementation of the most bizarre fantasies. His character then performs a Striptease in front of her beloved man, dressed in men's dress and then a moustache, looking for a close under the rain in a dark alley... (it Should however, be noted that its experimental excitement only for a couple of months and have enough.)
As for oral and anal sex, then this variation is at least a hint (censorship does not sleep! ) shows a screen almost every erotic scene as a common phenomenon. And anyone who even once all this was observed in the performance of internationally recognized sex symbols, involuntarily asks: "Why not try? "
But then usually wakes up the internal censor, who sternly uttered "And don't you dare to think! You're a decent person, and not some pervert! " And unremitting fantasy chastised hidden in the depths of the soul. However, it would seem, is the time to honestly answer the question: what actually are sexual perversions and where is the limit "decency", which leads to debauchery? That is reprehensible and in no case is unacceptable for a self-respecting man, but that still can afford, as many others do it for their pleasure?
A recognized expert in this matter is the Austrian psychiatrist Richard von Kraft-Ebing, a pioneer in the field of issledovaniyeyami. Sadism, masochism, fetishism, exhibitionism - all these sayings coined it. It was fifty years ago. Today the works of the famous Viennese Professor, a contemporary of Freud, it is impossible to read without a smile. For if you believe the founder of modern sexology, a large part of what now happens almost in every bedroom, should be attributed to distortions. It was one of the morals of the time!
There are in sexology is the notion of the range of acceptability. It includes all those caresses, posture and techniques that partners find acceptable and desirable in a sexual relationship. Now, during the Kraft-Binga this range looked more like a narrow corridor: only this and only step left, step right - debauchery! No wonder that in such hard part is ripe rich clientele for Dr. Freud. People who wanted the same thing, that we had to worry acute feelings of guilt and shame for their bad inclinations. On this basis, and has been rampant all sorts of neuroses.
The remnants of conservative morality still make themselves felt in a deeply internalized internal guidelines: "a Decent person can't afford this and that, the fifth and the tenth, because it's wrong and unacceptable". Still many, as their great-grandmothers, are convinced that the only thing that can go a woman (and then, of course, within a sanctified marriage law) is an affirmative nod in response to claims of a spouse, and not to make any movements, patiently waiting until he will be performing some repetitive manipulations of her body. Respectively, and the man is supposed to chase away any thoughts that deviate from the routine script. Nothing else is allowed, up to a literal "mom said not to". And what, actually, this is not allowed? My mom, of course, though it is not itself made up all of these prohibitions. Sigmund Freud, another famous specialist, was convinced that man by nature is inherent in almost all the variations of the search for pleasure, which the company refers to the abnormalities. In fact, for a small child no no standards at all - it is, according to Freud, being diverse perverted. (Probably the famous Viennese psychiatrist much exaggerated, and even just made that up, but something in our nature noticed them quite accurately.)
Parents and teachers instill in a person the concept of normal, outline for his narrow circle of "permitted". But natural urges to continue implicitly to exist and from time to time make themselves felt. In other words, each of us lives a few tiny perverts, which we ourselves (though a stern voice, mom and dad) get stuck in the dark corners of his soul and even embarrassed to admit their existence. And that was not so ashamed, with the utmost nicety notice and condemn deviations from those who are not very shy. Because of their background, we look so gracious and healthy! So, according to Freud, fierce female hatred of naked photomodels and strip teasers caused by the fact that the secret would like to show off undressed before the greedy man's views, but show nothing special, and ashamed besides...
However, every lady, if to be honest with themselves, have to admit that it probably happened in the summer on the beach to catch yourself Frank, "body" (although to shoot-it was already almost nothing) men's views. While a modicum of resentment had its fair share of secret pleasure. Speaking Kraft-Binga, this pleasure is called a terrible word exhibitionism, i.e. evidence of the perversity of nature.
In General, the venerable Professor at the modern beach probably kick would be enough - in his time swam almost in dresses to toe. For us almost nothing covering bikini quite decent beach toilet. But it is the beach! To rise in this form on the waterfront is already a challenge. And a few yards adjacent to quay street and there is a risk to be fined for offending public morality. That is, the people themselves have spent quite visible limits of decency and agreed to follow them. Similarly, a man who admires on undressing dancer variety, will deserve condemnation except from his own wife, and watching furtively upon undressing in the window opposite neighbor you will certainly pass for vile pervert-voyeur.
It seems that today we are at a level of public morality, when whether or not anything is determined by whether we are putting this "anything" on General assessment contrary to accepted standards or practice in private, where nobody's conviction cannot provoke. Because we shy it is the condemnation, that is someone else's assessment. And if you are alone with your loved one, whom you appreciate? It may, of course, raises the question: "And do not consider whether he (she) me perverted nature? " Most likely, this question can easily be discarded. Because partner can't wait when you finally decide to let him (or her) and myself to do something "didn't Mama".
Modern sexologists believe that your range of acceptability partners should set for ourselves, as we choose for themselves a suitable diet. After all, no man is free not to eat, but different people satisfy their hunger in very different ways. One gladly eats meat, he is crazy like trupoint and prefers vegetarian food, the third is not against meat, but national cultural traditions recommend him to avoid pork... And then, perhaps, everyone is right and no one needs to make a shortcut of pervert. And if a gourmet invites you to taste the ant eggs or turtle fillet - why not try. Don't like no place this dish in your diet.
That is, the two must decide what is good for them and what is bad, not relying on someone's moral judgments and estimates, but only on their own experience. It is absolutely unnecessary the range of acceptability of one pair will be used for the other our individual preferences were formed in the course of a lifetime, unconsciously and implicitly. Which of the tiny internal perverts vote depends on individual characteristics.
Here only it is hardly possible to entertain the illusion that no such evil kid is not hiding in the secret corners of your soul. Bad, if it grows in large dictator, not allowing you to take pleasure in no other way, except for specific sophisticated. Then, perhaps, you should talk about the real perversion, when a peculiar way to meet outshines everything other methods.
And Mature and truly healthy person can be considered that without fear or shyness (of course, in a private setting) much can afford and benefit from this uncomplicated pleasure. To determine your range of acceptability, it is necessary simply to experiment, not trusting first impressions, and trying to find beauty everywhere. The fact that for the first time ashamed and embarrassed, and maybe even painful or unpleasant, maybe the second or third attempt and enjoy. After all ordered the same wise nature so that the first act of intimacy is the most natural and "normal" for any women accompanied by pain. But then, entering into the taste, it's hard to tear yourself away from the fun (unless, of course, to learn fully get it).
And do not need to think - "what will people say?.." First, it's not their business, and yours alone. Secondly, just won't tell, if you don't flaunt their individual characteristics and tastes. You have the right, without causing harm to anyone, to enjoy as you like. Continuing the culinary analogy, we can say: if you relished dog chops, enjoy their content at a Korean restaurant, only do not impose this dish all their guests - their tastes are probably quite different. That is about the limits of what is permitted to ask yourself first of all.
Source:
Sex-log
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