Many of us live in conditions of constant overload. Home, family and work, work, work... In this whirlwind we cease to notice the details of life, do not get pleasure from communicating with friends and family, we forget to care for themselves. And constantly feel guilty, because all the time something did not: someone didn't call, with someone not met, promised not done.
"Calm down", "Breathe deeply", "pause" - sometimes we persuade ourselves. But most of us just can't do step aside, step back and look at the situation from a different angle of view. In everyday life we are unable to place the correct emphasis: what is important and valuable and what is momentary and not worth the emotional costs. And only in the dramatic moments of our life (accident, illness, loss of loved ones) suddenly everything else becomes insignificant ridiculous the face of the master.
Life on the run
Many of us live at full speed and I can't slow down, thinking that it is live and other people. Especially this sense, residents of large cities.
"Speed has become part of urban life and culture about 20-30 years ago, " says an existential psychotherapist Svetlana Krivtsov. - The acceleration profoundly changed not only the way of life of millions of people, but also for their thoughts".
We have lost the ability to anticipate the long term, to savor their desires and dreams. Fast paced, need to immediately meet their own and other people's desires become our lifestyle. To slow down, to stop scary mainly because of the great danger to fall out of the cage": to lose the prestigious place of work, to be replaced with more young professionals.
"When we reduce their claims, retreating from prescribed by the society of friends, we really run the risk of falling out of their social circle," says the sociologist Vladimir Magun. And explains: "Nearly 25 years, we study the change in the life aspirations of the Russian high school graduates. In 1985, at the beginning of the study, the ultimate aspiration was to become a leader of a small team, a wooden Bungalow, apartment, rooms where one less than the family members, "Lada". Now in the responses appears in a large brick house, many graduates of the school dream to lead enterprises and institutions, to have their own business. And to achieve these goals, ready to work intensively".
Of course, not all of us are ambitious workaholics. And this is confirmed by the figures: labour productivity in Ukraine is approximately three times lower than in America. And yet 40% of Ukrainians aged 18 years and older argue that for them, the most important achievements in the work, and 27% say that would like to have a more responsible position.
Our commitment to manage time, paradoxically, led to the fact that time is constantly moving away from us. Because of the fast pace of life narrows our horizons, inhibits natural behavior, not leaving room to grow, discover new things and be open to other people.
"To be successful, we have to control his emotions, " explains existential psychotherapist Svetlana Krivtsov. And as a result, we lose sensitivity and continue to run, not paying attention to what happens to us".
Well, even Montaigne argued that "the glory and peace of mind never sleep in the same bed"***. There comes a point when we realize that our strength is finite, and we are not ready to the achievements of the price of a constant stress.
Learning to live slower
Writer Michael ende present many parables in the tale "Momo" wrote that in one small town appeared buyers free, wasted time. And instantly faded, became meaningless lives of those who have not left even a moment to stop and listen to the birds singing, watch the sunset, to see the changing of the seasons...
The ultimate purpose of human life is to reveal himself more fully, to show their "spark of God" and to feel confident, to feel the reliability. You need to find the optimal level of stress and to expend energy at the pace and direction, which correspond to our innate characteristics and preferences. Each of us better develop your rhythm of life, in which mental and physical strength will miss out on all ideas, concerns, experiences and emotions.
"We need to learn to take care of its own," says Svetlana Krivtsov. And for this purpose it is necessary to separate the primary from not too important for our life. To determine the true values, to have a clear plan of action and finally to run.
Ask yourself
Meditation, group therapy or the practice of personal growth help us to manage their emotions and act in frightening situations. Therefore, we need to pause, ostranitsa from happening, to understand the emotions, clarify their thoughts, and finally to feel the balance is in our power. And first of all, because we remain free, no matter how evolved our life. Free people in the absolute sense of the word. Anyway so claimed philosopher Merab Mamardashvili: "If a human being dependent or is a slave, only a slave to his own ghosts, which grew out of his own soul. It's not the world makes him a slave to the world of man is absolutely free"
Author:
A. Skochinsky
Source:
Wday.ru
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