But it's not just that the child to punish severely. Punishment is ineffective as the educational reception and leads to long-term negative consequences. Don't believe? Let's look closer.
The result is fear
Punishment makes children fear. Fear the child may stop to behave badly. But this is only a surface effect. If you carefully observe the child's behavior, it becomes clear that he is looking for ways to get even with the bullies. He may sulk, to spoil things, to do something out of spite, to seek revenge on the brothers or sisters. In addition, the use of punishment causes in the child's anger, resentment, desire for revenge. Or Vice versa, fear, uncertainty, doubt. Such feelings do not contribute to the success of education, except that you want to fix in your child.
Emotions from childhood
These two typical and extreme type of the consequences of the sanctions we very often see in adults: evil aggression and insecurity, passivity, timidity. Psychosomatic diseases - decreased immunity, digestive disorders, heart - often the result of stress caused by punishment. The habit of "seizing" a negative emotion, which leads to excessive weight also comes from the children's psychological trauma. And the greatest number of such injuries the child receives it in the family.
Hiding your head in the sand
The main reason why we think the punishment is effective is that after it is applied often undesirable child behavior stops. However, in practice, it only means that we cease to see. So the ostrich hiding its head in the sand, thinking that the danger was gone. Punishment and threat teach the child not to get caught, make it quirky, secretive. While undesirable behaviors is transformed into the pores in the other form, invisible to us. But this is a time bomb. After some time it may explode act, reasons which we will not be able to explain.
Excerpted from Galina and Michael Town, psychologists, parents of two children.
Source:
Women's Magazine
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