If a man is to ask whether it requires the empathy and support, then most likely, he will say, "Well, no...". I will say right or hint that need sex, the manifest duty of male aggression.This is us in the difficult moments of need bridesmaids to postoperatively, and they need friends to help a specific action. Are written about it in numerous management relations: "Men are from Mars, women are from Venus", "Men with farce, women with plywood", "Men in masks, women Panthers".
But then it is unclear why at least once a year some of them come to us, and dumped it on the head a whole bunch of their suffering and problems, including sexual and "relational"? Why do they complain about one of the women on the other, if not looking for sympathy? And not as they are crazy to think that we will take their side and recognize that their wife or mistress was incorrect? Seriously if they believe that there are women who can complain about that "she got pregnant, and I answer! "you, "but I'm not sure I want to marry! ", "I got sick of her perfume! "if it again will cook soup, I'm going to fit...", "who gave her the right to dispose of my money"? The intended reaction is probably: "How dare her? You are so wonderful, infallible! "
A high degree of trust between a man and a woman, from the point of view of women is possible only when a man secretly, perhaps unconsciously, in love with one chest which he is crying! Women being more harmonious and prefer to engage in sexual relations with men, which they psychologically close. But no! In the men's consciousness lives the image of asexual ("disinterested," said one of my friends), but emotionally warm woman who will take it all and it will not require anything in return. The image of the mother? Sisters?
This myth is so strong that, if you have got such friends-men, that is "man-friend", you simply will not be able to get away from them! Of course, they will notice your frustration, but don't rush to fix the relationship, for example, to listen to the answer or to provide any help with the housework. They will disappear for a long time in an unknown direction, until you feel that the time has come to "merge" their problems again. They are sure that it happens so rarely and unobtrusive that you just do not what going to blame.
This phenomenon is psychological proximity with complete or partial absence of physical contacts I call "spare the woman." This was originally written book reviews and letters I receive so far. And the book, and the theme was open. I explain that the need for "back-up partner" is simple: the mind of man tech; prone to risks, male counts on technical insurance, and if the main strategy of his life are not met, it uses a fallback. In my opinion, very reasonable.
If this was even a drop explosive love... And instead of love - only the need for absolute recognition...
The main thing to suit sat...
But if you still want not just to listen but to sympathize in a traditionally feminine manner, for example, will say to him: "Dear, I understand you! ", "What a pity...", "let's sit up closer Yes tell me more, how was it? " - it would be better if you remained silent. Because he will immediately realize that this is a trap that you are pulling him into its territory, to make war on their terms. Not so he is stupid and naive!
Sympathy the man is a real problem when you consider that feelings are what men are taught to hide even from themselves. Even when they suffer deeply, we see before us them in full dress and in absolute splendor. The worse is in their hearts, the more they try to look. And even when one of them dares to complain of life, we see before us is quite safe subject. Thoughts that come to our female mind, disappointing for men: "Complains because some stuff, we would have such problems! " We thump of hands they hunt and any hope for peace talk. Men are very confusing, the code in the difficult moments of trying to look better than usual. Sympathize with the fact that they had lost hope. The one who swaggers, not yet exhausted. Men think well kept and they will be counted. And we think that's not too bad their case, if enough effort to show off.
When it comes pressed to Shine in the eyes of the client, the first thing I think: "Oh, how bad our works!.."
They are drawn to impress us, and do not intend to surrender hook, line and sinker. All I'd advise you to do is confirm the words that he still hoo! Well done-the cucumber! Appeal to a spare variant is a sample lower limit its appeal. Even if spare friend will deny him the attention, you need to do something extra. Get drunk? To hang himself? Played in the dust?
If you actually feel sympathy for those in trouble, not stingy on few encouraging phrases.
What hunt hunters
Spiritual contact between man and woman seems impossible because we have different, if not hostile, ideals. For example, every real man most afraid to be a woman. While a woman from childhood lives in the hope that it will be able to become a real lady. The first fear exists, and second, men are afraid of becoming the object of men's claims. But this is exactly what we dream of a woman! We are so opposite, even in their anatomical experiences that we have almost no chance to understand each other really.
In the brain of men there as an option "exceptional woman", which is not only better than all women, but the best of all men. So they are ready to worship. What is its difference from all the rest? She had no doubt the exclusiveness of men. Never, never, no matter what happening in reality, she did not betray his ideals, not stung by the reproach, not turned away, not cursed. It is clear that such a woman may be, or the virgin, or the mummy.
Don't know how you will feel such as I often inject. It is hard to believe that they take this seriously. Well, get what they deserve: they are gone forever.
Do you know how they answer the question: "How can you live with it?! " - "Suffer. Nothing requires such infernal patience as a woman".
Complex gratitude
Comfort all who suffer and are deprived of nature could serve our complex gratitude for what they spend in front of nature and God those deficiencies, of which we are deprived. View browsegate every morning men personally touches me to tears. I think this could be done the next step is to approach him in the back with the words: "Thank you... I'm so touched and so grateful..." - "what?! Suggested answer: "For this..." Ambiguity enhances gratitude. We rarely tell them thank you, that would be nice to send impulses of gratitude in ritual mode, as an advance for the future and our apology for the past.
You need to think and learn phrases that would support the ideal sphere of men.
- "Thou art fairer than all who comes to my mind in the best frame of mind".
- "I personally like the way you do it (no matter what) do! "
"My dear, you are the best man of Eurasia! "
- "And who have absolute champion in omelettes? " (Better "Breakfast of eggs, but it depends on who prepares Breakfast.)
These recommendations are especially good for a married lady. Don't forget that outside the gates of our homes is home to a huge number of free, intelligent, spare women. They really are not too lazy to say enigmatically: "Man, you stand out from the crowd..." - "What? "Yes to all! Just do not think that I need something". Wagging her hips, slowly it will be deleted in bold waiting for the correct response.
All of them, so he would go to the edge of the world. Minus one.
Author:
Mach O.
Source:
Our Psychology
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