"You don't understand me at all! As if to speak different languages! " - resent you, seeing that the words "dear-dear-only, once again, did not reach the addressee. And hear the answer the same phrase... Really really women and men will never be able to "negotiate"? Undecideds and debethune
"Mash", "Jay", "falls apart as forty" - notorious female talkativeness has long been not in respect of the stronger sex. But no matter how unflattering epithets bestowed ladies slovokhotov, change what is in our nature, no one can. It turns out that in ancient times girls Willy-nilly coached his talkativeness. After all, what was the lifestyle of the tribe? While the miners were "lost" on the hunt, women and children remained in the cave. And if the hunter in dead silence was stalking prey, "family" talked vengeance - them-what's stopping you? The same thing then ladies practiced, going in search of edible fruits and plants: not for a moment did not stop the roll-negotiations - as well as the tiger will jump out from the bushes?
Here and agreed to a sad end when we are the weaker sex talk, you'll use a much larger portion of the brain than the other half of humanity. And so easily spoken 6-8 thousand words a day, while men just barely manage 2-4 thousand. They, poor devils reached your limit already by noon, and we are able to talk deep into the night. Probably, the conclusion is clear: if he prefers to spend the evening in silence, it does not mean that in a relationship there is a crisis. Exhausted voice the stock - and that's it!
Hear me!
It would seem that if nature has given us the "green light", awarding the talkativeness, God himself commanded not aware of problems in communication. But no! You know what sometimes turns into a conversation with a partner so I would not plotted, one upset... But thanks psychologists, who have studied all the details of the speech of both sexes, you can get a man to listen to your words. Well, or at least to understand what he meant and not be offended. Just stick to the following rules.
Rule # 1. From main to secondary
Talking with the man, first tell me about the main and only then lay out the details, able to attract his attention. As women begin the story? Correctly, "from afar", like "it was a nice Sunny day, then pump the voltage to "the curtain" to give a killer replica for which the story began. And the man had already lost patience and irritable...
Take this example: a wife with excitement waiting for the husband to tell him about her own forces arrested the robber. The beginning of the monologue: "I ran around the kitchen, I hear the front door opened. Wybiegu in the corridor is a stranger..." the Pale man grabs the phone to call the police, she stops him, saying: "All right, he has been arrested! "
Learned yourself? Change style of talking with the male population of key phrases put in the forefront of the conversation.
Rule # 2. Interrupted? Let's start first!
Men have a bad habit of interrupting, even if his companion is a fragile lady. And they do it much more often than we often unconsciously and not wanting to offend. Why do they do this? The fact that the male brain is focused on the solution, while our just in the process of communication. And when we excitedly described the situation, interlocutor immediately offers tips on how to act.
So instead of silently swallow the insult after the "heckling", try to neutralize the moment comments such as "...coming back to my question" or "I'm sorry, I'm not finished". Men in such cases, insist that such phrases, and we, the spirit is not enough. In addition, girlish voice sounds quieter than male baritone or bass, so you have to stretch the ligaments to be heard. Nevertheless, insist on his own, and you will gain more respect from your partner.
Rule # 3. Descriptions and enthusiasm can't wait!
Accept the fact that the strong floor in his speech uses more nouns and verbs, and we "favor" to the names of adjectives and adverbs. So, if your partner says that "the film is not bad" or "dress sits OK", think of it as the highest compliment, because superlatives ("Great! Awesome! Dizzying! "you still not going to make it.
Rule # 4. "We're on the same team! "
You never occupy a defensive position! Avoid even a formal apology for the fact that it does not have any relation to you, for which you do not answer. Comments like "I'm sorry that you didn't get promoted automatically make him a victim, and you are a criminal. But the phrase "it is outrageous that the Director General did not raise you a salary, but I'm sure they will correct their mistake" makes you allies, shows that you can become a Prosecutor, and not just povzdyhat sympathetically.
Rule # 5. Thoughts, not feelings
Expressing his opinion about the event or person, avoid the words "I feel", "I feel" - these phrases irrational, because for men the world of sensations and feelings - the secret behind seven seals. Another thing, when you say "I think" - the interlocutor immediately sees that his opponent "connected" to the process head, and not only heart! Agree, the phrase "I think you make a hasty decision" sounds more significant than "I have a feeling that you've gone off the deep end". The first sounds like a cool observation, the plaintive whining.
Rule # 6. Get closer
However, emotions should not be written off, they are able to say its weighty word in a conversation with a man. For example, you see that the conversation was taking a bad turn, partner mercilessly throws you in the face prosecution (alas, fair). Don't let the situation tense to the limit, take the other person for hand or priobnimet will decrease tension, the fellowship will come to a peaceful course. Psychologists explain it this way: touching a partner, you have to move on the path of pure logic and cold analysis on the way of emotions. So play on the feelings, you're a woman!
Rule # 7. Disagree? As it should be!
Oh, what are these "comrades" unrecoverable debaters! As they say, not feed bread - let to prove his innocence, to bring the killer arguments. And we, as being peaceful, seeing the violent reaction of the interlocutor, accept it for the misunderstanding. And it is in vain: the difference of opinion is a perfectly natural phenomenon in an interview with "Apollo", "tops" and "sesame". 't disturb him to speak, he is now passionate about the process of proof (to whom - does not matter). And for you it is not a formidable opponent, but only the listener and the viewer.
Rule # 8. More specifically!
Finish the conversation specific conclusions. For example: "You should take out the garbage, and I'm going to get up early to cook you Breakfast. The so-called conversation in vain who love women and hate men - not that other, as "a release of emotions", "letting off steam". In this case, you are simply doomed to failure in dealing with man. And continuing the theme of "concreteness": avoid allusions. From "Palomas-poluustav" become brutalized even the most kind and patient. Want his attention, hugs and kisses, so tell me! And no need to caducity about "anxiety and depression" - well, they don't understand hints, even the most transparent. One word - men!
Rule # 9. Silence is not always gold
As we, those who are called "Adam's rib" come, if you hurt someone? Yes, stop talking to a harmful substance (gender not important), put to silence. But these "harsh measures" effective only against women, which is very soon feels discomfort because they are no longer invited to the interviewee. As with men, unfortunately, this technique fails: reigning silence they perceive as a precious gift. And only after considerable time partner suddenly notices that have not heard "cute Twitter". In General, there are: if you have hurt your partner, bluntly put him in the eye. And if you want to punish some hours chatting incessantly, constantly changing the subject. Headache offender guaranteed!
Rule # 10. "Yes and he said that he loves! "
And finally, the last rule that all ladies should be remembered as "our father." These strange, but, nevertheless, loved men, I do not love every day to repeat the same recognition, which had once said. Yes, talking about them, about three magic words. And this situation you need to take. Although, of course, all women would like to see this phrase constantly sounded from his lips.
Man and Woman - dictionary differences
Exactly the opposite!
A man and a Woman. We are so different!
Author:
A. Izmailov
Source:
MyJane
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