Today every woman as ever, and many rights and responsibilities. We are not surprised endless war for the observance of "consumer rights" or "rights cheated tourists". However, all of these, of course, important measures lie in the field of protection of human rights only in the legal sense of the word.Meanwhile, in everyday life all of us much more likely to have to deal with the breach of the implicit and never "registered" human rights - let's call them psychological. The weaker sex to defend them sometimes even more difficult, however, as any other. So, what inherent psychological rights of each of us? Very roughly they can be divided into the following groups.
Lady Perfection
Perhaps the most important area of psychological law that affects the relationship of man to himself. Simply because this depends on the level of self-esteem, and relationships with others.
Right to be wrong and to be faulty is the basis of harmonious relations with itself. The rejection of this principle can lead to excessive perfectionism - the desire to be the best at any price. If somewhere perfectionism and may be useful only at work and then for a limited time.
Of a tendency to perfectionism show:
- a constant striving to make a spurt, then another, and another... ;
- the tendency to total planning, dislike of surprises;
often the feeling of acute shortage of time;
- diligence to comply with any order before the deadline.
What is so wrong and harmful? This behavior leads to the fact that You refuse your
the right not to perform unreasonable requirements. This is unlikely to lead to positive results in the quarry or on the way to personal happiness. Folk wisdom on this topic ruthless: "Who is lucky, and pogonat".
To reduce too advanced needs perfectly, you must realize that You are not omnipotent. Allow yourself to relax, trust the natural course of events for even one day. Try to remember and analyze the situation in which all of Your carefully crafted plans were in second destroyed unpredictable circumstances. However, this does not always lead to a terrible outcome? Remember, You always have
the right to illogical decisions. Make sure that the goals You want to achieve, You really expensive. You are not obliged to give up his the right not to act to its detriment!
In addition, the essential role played
the right always to be the a and not to conform to the expectations of others. In everyday life too many popular stereotypes, which more often than not it is complicated and at the same time as would deprive "taste, color and odor", turning into a chain of meaningless rituals. If You have this feeling of certain differences between the "well made" and "I do not like it, make a choice in favor of their own preferences. So You are implementing your the right to retain its own "I" regardless of external circumstances.
This is my world
The most painful violation concerns the most expensive that we have, namely our inner world, our thoughts, feelings and experiences. We often forget about his
the right to own feelingsregardless, you see them around.
This implies that You should not be ashamed or afraid of any manifestation of their feelings or emotions, even if others do not understand or believe it is a "shame" or "real women never do". This applies not only to the negative effects that may be someone convicted. Sometimes for some reason we hesitate to say a compliment (not understand), thank (by telephone uncomfortable, and personally can't) and so on...
And remember
the right to request assistance and emotional support. Some believe this behavior alleged "weakness", meanwhile, is the realization of a completely natural human needs.
So naturally desire to implement
the right to be aloneeven if others want to communicate with You. It is impossible to be constantly "connected", this need is quite a strong source of stress. Therefore sometimes it is necessary to literally turn off the phone and chat with them.
And more! Don't forget about your
the right to establish and terminate relationships with someone depending on Your own intentions and desires, not because You expect or require.
Do as I (want)
Very often the cause of our psychological rights outside becomes manipulation. Theoretically, be subject to manipulation - does not mean to do themselves harm, but certainly for the good of the manipulator. In practice, however, it is still often leads to what is manipulated, some inconvenience or loss of time, effort, any other resource.
The surest way to feel that You are being manipulated, it is to listen to your inner voice. Intuition will tell You that there is "something wrong". However, often the manipulators and not trying somehow to disguise their intentions, and Express them openly and directly. Here is the time to remember that You always have
the right to say "no" all that is uninteresting or unnecessary.
Here are the main methods of combating manipulation as the violation of Your rights. Perhaps predominates here
the right not to explain, not to justify their behavior. Implemented it in the form of a brief, polite but firm refusal. If possible, do not answer the questions, let's not drag the conversation away and do not give any arguments in defense of their position (can be assured, they will be immediately challenged by the interlocutor). Compose a short sentence explaining Your position, and repeat "principle of plates". By the way, this is a great method for socializing with gossip, adoring tactless questions or, more precisely, the interrogations. So interested, why You got divorced, you can calmly reply: "out of love". You most likely will quickly fall behind.
It is convenient to refer to your own habit or family tradition, especially if their existence cannot be verified. Not less effective to delay or to promise to consult with your boss/husband, and then to say that, perhaps, nothing happens.
In General, do not forget that You always have:
- the right to change your mind;
- the right to say "I don't care";
- the right to terminate the conversation when the other person behaves incorrectly.
Author:
Bitco A.
Source:
MyJane
No comments:
Post a Comment