When we got the first hits of the singer W., parents Lights were still teenagers. They cannot be called a "fanboy", but they never missed entries Charles, when they themselves were in hand. They were not rushing to see all the movies with her participation, but not without curiosity watching how scandalous rock diva, starring in the clip, which is still not allowed to broadcast on MTV, appeared on stage in a Broadway musical and received the most prestigious music award of the year. As she became a Hollywood actress, and she was awarded the "Oscar" for best actress. When years gone from the reach of the press, and then re-appeared in concert halls, "more seductive than her itnaa daughter." How did charity work, donating to it a significant amount.Biography of W. for show business rather standard than unique. But where parents were just curious, and sneered, Light bumped into ideals, like "Titanic" on the iceberg. In W. she saw all that was required of her teenage confusion. From the life she wanted only a personal meeting with the singer. And fate had responded to her plea.
Charles announced that, reaching 50 years, will embark on a farewell tour around the world. As he got tickets to the concert and what it cost, in the family and in the calculation to get used to not. Light was frankly happy. This saw her for the first time in my life. And father, businessman average hands, without sound sent her after the singer. Returning, she said that she has managed to achieve a personal meeting with Charles And she not only gave her a signed photo, but was invited to his concert in new York.
The girl was on the verge of happiness and despair, and my father had no choice. Money for the trip had been secured. And Light together with three happy girls flew to America. All went quite well. Girls met, placed in a decent hotel. Food, travel, tickets to the concert hall is due to W. we Must assume that the rock star was pleased with the advertising effect of his action: Newspapers wrote a lot about "groupies" (so-called fans everywhere riding for his idol, like a support group). She invited the girls to continue to accompany her on tour. But already in Australia.
Again my father was not a choice. Although now had to calculate to the penny. Eventually he sold his second car, which was called "family". And daughter went in pursuit of W. on the Green continent. Repeated all. Not worse, not better. And in fact ended. Maybe because came to Sveta time of graduation, career choices and College enrollment. Maybe because the family did not remain available funds. Maybe because Charles was tired of "groupies".
I will not judge the actions nor the Lights, nor parents, nor a rock star. It was what it was. That will hardly change. How to judge? It is in the full sense of their private business. But is impressive in itself the force of gravity "stars", even measured in rubles.
Do not make yourself... fetish
It is no secret that the show business takes care of its own authority: neprerivno sums up the charts, organize ridiculous prize type "Grammy", "ovation" or "Silver Shoe", gives a romantic title type "Living legend", achieves state awards and medieval titles of peers and lady for their representatives. But by itself, advertising svistoplaska obscure. Fans are expressed more openly and accurately.
For example, in America pop star called "idol". And there is a subtlety that should be taken into account. For naive primitive fetishist wooden statue or stone woman were not a symbol and not an icon, but God himself. One of its kind idol could lead ancient hunter in ecstasy, restoring the peace of the soul, a keen eye and firm hand. Modern man, even a teenager, of course, is far from such naivety.
But the more painful to him when dreams don't come true, claims are rejected, friends betray, things are not glued. And pop star one of its kind removes any disorder of the senses, they say: "What are doing, and the famous and rich! "
It's not a trivial example. Here meeting with ideal connection to the Supreme being with whom will be happy, successful and all rights. And modern, maybe even atheist teenager immersed in the mystical fetishism.
But that's the difference. Stone woman dumb and motionless. It only focuses coming from inside human impulses. Because of primitive fetishism was, in essence, the underlying mechanism of concentration of their own mental powers, by way of self-identity.
And pop star sings and dances. She is aggressive imposes the audience their feelings and thoughts, their way of life. This spiritual violence because of his favorite poses and costumes, gestures and intonation showmen influence the subconscious mind. Repeating, like a spoiled gramophone, cries-spell type: "not gonna get Us! Not gonna get us! "; "You left me! You left me! "; "Be or not be! Whether or not be! " and the like-provoking echolalia - automatic repetition of words (as in autism); zatverdevanie (as in the early stages of learning the language infant) rehabilitating stereotypes, fusion reflex actions with words-commands (like hail guards or advertising slogan), but because of the aggressive self-indulgence of show business: "don't look! or "I don't like - don't listen! "it is a malicious deception. Do not give the pop star to make a conscious choice: first "click" on unconditioned reflexes, then on the resulting dependency.
I admit that many adults share some of fetishism in popular culture is needed, as the percentage of alcohol in beer. Without this fails to do it to have fun or relax. But the children in the sphere of show business is another matter. Even virtual idol worship often leads to the fact that it does not happen in their lives or the actual first love or mutual selfless friendship.
From idols to peers
Let your child will have a favorite hero. It is very necessary for the full development of personality, to select goals to follow, finally. But it's better if between him and the star will be the distance.
To communicate, to make friends and to compete reasonably with their peers. Only they are allowed to affect the attitude of your child to your idol. The opinions of adults, especially parents, he will likely be rejected as biased, wrong and unfair. And will persevere until it will not ask those with whom he wants to be friends: "Tell me who is your idol, and I know what to expect from yourself".
Full exemption from "star" dependencies will begin at the moment when the teenager will succeed in the realm of what his peers considered prestigious in sports, creativity, practical skills. Feeling the sincere interest of friends, it will become more critical to his idol.
But what in this case is required from the parents?
First of all, understanding. Fans are not born. Most often they are children who feel their remarkable abilities, but do not meet the recognition. From idol they wait authoritative recognition of their merits, if you want, blessings, and merge with his power and glory.
So you need to try to recognize the abilities and talents of the child. When they are free and accelerated development of all other problems are resolved by themselves. This is a difficult case. You may need the help of experts. For starters, you can go to the school psychologist.
Secondly, the ability unobtrusive, but sharply to exclude on time every influence idol on the child and any contact with other fans. For example, to go on vacations in the skiing or Hiking, kayaking, where there will be a heavy backpack, the duties of a camp fire or dishwasher, tourism fraternity, different songs under a guitar and maybe, you'll be friends too different warehouse. Or go to the sea in a place where music, fashion quite different musicians, and the name of the idol only causes confusion...
Third, activity in the search sections, clubs, studios, where you can enjoy the prestigious things and where respect for the talent and skill, not stupid closeness to the idol. It may be worthwhile to invite home a good coach or teacher, for example, design or a foreign language, to have the ableness of the child closer to the professional level. And it will be effective investments in the child, not the bargain spending in pursuit of idols.
Fourth, and this may be the most important thing: you need to expand the circle of the family, gathering in one group of children and adults, which together go to museums, concerts, exhibitions and presentations and talk about it passionately and many.
Author:
E. Pronina
Source:
The health of the schoolchild
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