Friday, April 4, 2014

The art of being an optimist


The art of being an optimistPositive Outlook on life seems unattainable. However, those who had seized him, convinced that the only way worth living.



Solid pros


No one would argue that being an optimist is better, nicer and cheaper than a pessimist. And not so much for others as for himself. Not least because optimists, according to statistics, less likely to get sick and suffer from mental illness, and live longer. They are confident and successful in career, like others, have a lot of friends. Looking for optimists, it seems that everything in life they are easy, but the problem somehow miraculously bypass their party.




- The optimist indeed more opportunities in life, " says psychologist Alexander Matouqin. - It is with pleasure and interest looks at the world, most shares with others positive emotions, charges them with love, energy. And it certainly is returned to him. In contrast, the pessimist usually dissatisfied with what is happening around, often is in a sad mood, criticizes everything and everyone and rarely sees the good in people.




The ability to see the world in color, not dark colors lets not get hung up on the problems and find a way out of any difficult situation.




Inoculation of trust and love




Optimism is not a character trait, it is not inherited, but usually begins in the family. The child comes to life with the mindset of the parents. If from childhood he sees that the closest people are suspicious of the world and to others, perceiving them as a potential threat, often feel discontent, wind himself, and he will live in such a scenario. Conversely, when parents gladly communicate with the world and other people and fill the child with love, warmth and trust, and he will probably inherit this attitude.




It is important and how parents respond to the child: take his mistakes and failures as a catastrophe or treat them calmly, as to the inevitable, but manageable situations on the path to adulthood. Depending on this and the child will be assessed in the future everything with him.




- It also happens that optimism is formed as contrary: parents dark and aggressive, and the child smiling, open, trusting, " says Alexander Matouqin. In this case, it seems to blindly gropes space, where it is warmer, with teachers in school, with peers or in the family of a close friend. And unconsciously includes mechanisms that help them to protect themselves. But those who inoculation of love to yourself and the world was made in the family, the immune system will be stronger and stronger.




Power thoughts




They say that thoughts are material. What is the scenario of the event you provide this with high probability and will be. Will be afraid of the upcoming interview, you will see mentally that it will be unsuccessful, most likely, it will happen. And if you try to calm down and relax, we will present that the meeting was successful and you would like an employer, there's a big chance that you will get the coveted place. And it's not that sufficient to attract good luck by the power of imagination. The thought is able to awaken in man of great inner work and focus on that goal.




- That's positive thought: first we think, then we present a picture - an image of our desires and in the end show activity - begin, - says Alexander Matouqin. When we take responsibility for our thoughts, our dream is becoming a reality. For the person who is on the path of optimism, it is very important to learn to think positively. And still need to radically change your attitude towards yourself is to accept yourself unconditionally, with all faults and defects, to love your imperfections, it starts with optimism. And then it will be possible to listen to yourself, to understand what I really want, and just follow their desires without collapsing and without turning back, despite the stereotypes, doubt, friends, parents dismay. You will certainly be rewarded - optimism will give different quality of your life will help to avoid dissatisfaction, envy, comparison, hatred and come to love, gratitude, joy.





Change your life!


But it is easy to say and difficult to do. Where to start and how to progress on this path? Here are a few tips that will help you to look differently at your life and believe that it really change for the better.




- Take a sheet of paper and write on it left their negative attitudes. And right rephrase them to positive. For example, left: every spring and fall I'm going to be sick, because I have health problems. Right: every spring and fall I feel full of energy and health.


- Try to surround yourself with people who think and think positively, try to from whom you are charged with positive energy, invite them in their environment, communicate with them, learn from them.


- Those situations that cause you negative reactions, attempt to see in a positive light. Hardly get on the plane for fear of an accident? Imagine that you met a loved one when you return home and are waiting for interesting people when you go to the office or to a business meeting. And then you will already be thinking about how come, and not about how scared to go and get into an accident.


Try to see in people the best of their quality. World dwlen: there are good and evil, positive and negative, day and night. Each person has both good and bad. Focus on his strengths.


- Imagine your life the way you want it to be. Make a collage by cutting out from magazines favourite pictures and glued them on a large sheet of paper as you want. Perhaps you will better be able to deal with their desires and create your own program that will inspire.


- Create a Bank of positive emotions that you have experienced and who brought you the happy moments in life. More often refer to them mentally and share them with others.


- Learn how to monitor your negative thoughts and emotions, to catch myself on them and switch on the positive here and now, without delay, reflection on the evening or morning. In this café, slow waiters and not very comfortable? But here delicious food and good music. This internal dialogue will help to focus on the good and raise your mood.


- If you feel that you find it difficult to cope with the problem yourself and all your efforts will not bring satisfaction and does not lead to the expected changes, it is better to seek help from a specialist.




No less difficult task - to grow optimistic of their children. Obviously, it will be easier if the parents are "infected" by this condition. What can you do?




First of all, to love and accept the child unconditionally, whatever it was. Not to focus on his shortcomings, to show him his best qualities and develop them.


- More likely to direct the child's attention on the joyful moments. Remember, together with him, as last year went on the sea, in the countryside, walking in the woods, the Park, met interesting people. Again, see pictures, which captures those unforgettable moments.


- Encourage him to do good deeds. To explain that from unpleasant situations you can always find the exit, and error - corrected. To show how important for people's attention and care. As an example, prepare together with him for all children who will come to his birthday gifts. You will see that this day will bring him a lot of discoveries.






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